Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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i'm hard

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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Why do catholic priests enjoy the company of boys? Because they must remain celibate and cannot have children of their own.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Why was little Timmy mauled by a bear? He poked it with a pointy stick.

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Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

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What did the amputee get for chritmas? A bicycle

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What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Assosiation.

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Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

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A man walks into a bar, he realizes his mistake and walks into the dentist next door where he had made an appointment to get his teeth cleaned.

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

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Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

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(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

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WHAT? FRIENDS? DID YOU NOT READ MY QUICKFUCK PROFILE? Likes: Orgies. Favorite color: Pussy. Description:Looking for women with vaginas (maybe an asshole is fine too) Please, I am a womanizer, of course we are friends, heck I am even romantic, you know romantic as in... Uh... Well, maybe not my rose bud... (because that did really not appear at the solve media right now)

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3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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