Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

How do u say hi to a black person JUST SAY HI RACIST

there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got run over on the way there.

What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

What do black people and asians have in common? arms

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

so a man walks into a bar..... and says ouch.

A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

Did you hear the one about the guy who went his whole life without ever telling a joke? He was still funnier than David Letterman.

Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

hey its jerry hey its dj want to see my goat noooo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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