what do you call a clown in makeup? a clown, clowns are supposed to wear makeup.

how do you call someone? use a phone

What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

autistic kids rock

What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

You're Mom is Dead She was killed by a Grammer Nazi for me misspelling Your

Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

What's yellow, black, and makes you laugh? A bus full of black people going off a cliff.

Friend: how obsessed are you with harry potter on a scale from 1-10 Me: 9 and 3/4

Whats the sad thing about 4 black guys going over a cliff in a car? It was my car!

What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one

Q: How do you make a baby cry? A: Throw a brick at it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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