What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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Why did people run from the chicken? Because they didnt want to get bit by the chicken

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What's upside down? umop apisdn

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

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What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

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Why did the Jew pick up the quarter on the sidewalk? Because he was going to buy a candy bar and was short 25 cents.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

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Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

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So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

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Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

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What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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A blonde and a brunette are walking down a street. What a great way to parade and recognise the various colours that lie upon ones head.

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I love pissing people off :P

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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