what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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drugs.

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

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I don't get it

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

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What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

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Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

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why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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on a scale from 0 to 100, how childish are you? 69

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I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

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Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

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When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

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MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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