What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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what did the white man call a black man that was awarded the job he applied for? He stated the man was a hard worker and deserved the job. Then he walked up to the man with a smile and congraduated him. Then he went home and commited suicide after he concluded he didnt deserve to live.

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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Why did suzy get in the car? She wanted to go somewhere.

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Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

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What is worse than banging your knee on the coffee table? Tripping over one of the legs and smacking your head on the floor, causing a severe concussion.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut you racist bastard

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Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

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A princess decided to kiss a frog in the hopes that it would turn into a handsome prince, as she found none of her suitors to her taste. The frog was incredibly poisonous and she died of total organ failure three days later.

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Was the worlds most expensive comedian any fun? Well, he was funny, but they where all cheap laughs. Moral: Expensive jokes are expensive.

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

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What does two plus two equal? 4

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A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

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what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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