- Anti Joke

If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

i black man walks in to a bar.he askes if he can make out with you? the man says"no. black man says"why? the guy says"because im not homersexal. black man says"oh. boss says"hey i told you dont talk to black people. guy says"no i can ekplan.boss says no more of buts or buy. boss says" you are fired guy says"NO! boss says"yup both of you get out! guys say no two guards come to talk them out. THE END`DONE!

A man walks into a doctors office and waits for his turn. After his name was called he walked up to the doctor and told him that he kept having hallucinations. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic to help with the mans addiction to LSD.

What do you call a chicken who crosses a road? Nothing, its still a chicken

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

In my country we don't swim, we drown.

There's a donut on a cruise ship and he goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain goes "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and says "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain replies "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain says "NO!" and throws him over board Theres a couple on the cruise ship and the man was going to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and propose. So he was showing his bestfriend (who was also on the cruise ship) the ring. But was he pulled it out the wind picked up and the ring fell over board. So the man was forced to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and couldn't propose. So they go to dinner and the both get crab. And when they open up the crab and guess what's in the crab?! Not the ring the donut!!!

A blonde boards a plane and sits in first class. Another passenger sees the blonde in his seat and tells her she's in the wrong seat. "I'm not moving!" says the blonde. The passenger calls over the flight attendant. "Ma'am, you're supposed to be seated in economy class," says the flight attendant. "Please come with me." "No! I'm not moving!" The flight attendant informs the pilot. The pilot comes out, whispers in the blonde's ear, and then the two have wild sex, right in the open. Oh my God, you should have been there. She had the most incredible rack ever!!!

I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

what is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a cadilac. a cadilac is something i want

What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

A woman walked into a college.....which wasn't suprising because she never learned to read

Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

i hate it when people repeat the same jokes. i just hate it when people repeat the same jokes.

y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, and they don't have to be blonde, anyone can screw in a light bulb.

What's black and White and black and White? A nun falling down a stairs

Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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