A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

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What is worse than the holocaust Nothing it was fine with the Jews in camps burning and dying

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What do you call a spoiled black daughter? Tiana (Disney Princess)

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Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

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why did rhys jones get shot. because he was there

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You're a country without the "tree". Did you just call me a cunt?

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Wha....You probably shouldnt read the rest of this because i lie a lot (This joke deserves lots of thumbs and comments!)

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What did the pear tree say to the farmer? Go harvest that corn over yonder.

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Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

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No, what you are saying, is that you have lost hope, one of the fundamental rules in creating such a society, is becoming the kind of person, in our case a man that has a notion of free will, the willpower to follow his own vision, the kind of man with a ideology so strong that it defies the rules imposed upon us by society. Then, you do neither go around breaking said rules, nor as you do, seek out people. No, if your ideology is better, stronger and greater than what society has imposed upon us since birth, then those we consider the strong, will seek people like us. You know the basics, humans as a whole are "monkey see monkey do", but for me at least, people of true value, do not follow others, but their own belief, values concepts of life and whatnot, this is the reason I from time to time come here and "Humiliate myself", people hate my guts, I know it, acknowledge it, until it fazes me no more, then every so often a few people like it. And there you got the core of what you are conveying, individuality based on self respect and respect for others, those people that sought people like me, had this value down at heart. Again that is not something you can teach others, how to think for themselves, no. You know how it is, we live in a society where people that love themselves and respect their own work are looked down upon by others, until many decide it is not worth the effort. And if that is what society has created, then you going around promising others a better lifestyle trough following their "heart", is just going to either have them abuse you, or worse, worship you. If you succeed at having people see you as a goddamn God, then it only takes a fucking generation, your fucking lifetime, before someone takes over, starts passing on drugs or alcohol, and claiming you where a God, and then you wasted your whole life into conveying something greater, but ended up creating what people like us hate, a religion indoctrination that destroys the human part that is able to think for itself and respect its own decisions. The problem with free will, is that you can also freely surrender it, and when the so called "greatest nation on the world" are war "in the name of God" against Satan, while the other is fighting for Allah, against, SHATAM... Then it should not take much more than a monkey to figure out humanity is simply fighting one another, in this case probably over a fucking translation error. And if this is what the world most powerful nation can offer, while their elitism assures that politicians live as kings, while the people suffer, all while "Gods nation" cannot even win a war over what is considered "camels and stones" Then you should know that there is still much hope, that people such as us can start even the smallest spark, of a better society, and that people will seek us out. But our kind cannot be made, only unmade, it is easy to surrender one`s personal values and become someone else. And when you claim to be me, and spread your weird values on a fucking anti-joke side on the worlds most broken site, then what is really left of you? And if you cannot stand against the tide, then what different is what you convey, that to what the mainstream media, politicians and religion spread? Moral: Get ready for a load of thumbs downs, people most have surrendered their values and free will, its hard to stand against the tide, but as long as people such as I and hopefully you stand strong, even if in seclusion, then we only need to ignite the spark in our equals in order to succeed, and we might be few, but together and as individuals strong, we can never truly be defeated.

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Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To look at the most interesting man in the world.

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a priest and a rabbi are walking down a road together the rabbi says: so your a priest how about that the priest says: fine ive read the bible a few times good book

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*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

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Why did little jimmy fall off the building? 9/11

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Q: Whats the difference between water melon and a baby? A: Watermelon is a fruit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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