-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

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A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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can't you hear that TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT, TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT flute (nicki minaj in a past life listening to a symphony)

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

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A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Whatever their names happen to be.

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A dancer walks into a barre

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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