- Anti Joke

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

What did the one Brick say to the other Brick? We have the same name.

What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

What's yellow and can't swim? A tractor.

Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a giraffe? A really f*cked up hybrid.

Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

What happened when a Black man ran into a white supremacist? They exchanged insurance information

Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house