When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

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Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

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I had 99 problems Solved them all

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What do you call a black man wearing tights? Rick

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

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Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

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Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

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Andoni was here

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

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So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

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What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

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What's brown and sticky? Feces.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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