The umpire asked the baseball coach "Who is that on 1st base?" The baseball coach said "Who." The umpire said "Yes, that's what I'm asking." The baseball coach handed the umpire a list of his players to avoid any further confusion.

Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

Your flying on a canoe, and one of the wheels breaks off. How many pancakes does it take to fix it? Trick question there is a gorilla on board.

Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. okay? Why did the chicken cross the road? why? because its motor skills allowed it to cross. dude, seriously? What did Jimmy's grandmother get him for Christmas? What?. Nothing she died two years ago. that's horrible. When did she die? On his birthday. Dude, stop! Wait how did she die? Fine, How? She was driving down the road and swerved to miss a chicken. oh. And what did she hit? UGGG What? Thankfully not me. because I wasn't the tree. :0 oooooooooooooh

An american, a mexican, and an asian are on a boat. The boat is sinking because it is too heavy. The people decide to throw off things that they have a lot of in their country. The asian throws rice off the boat saying, "We have plenty of rice at home." The mexican throws tacos off the boat saying, "We have plenty of tacos at home." The american throws out the mexican saying, "We have plenty of mexicans at home."

so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

Ehh

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

What has red dots and is yellow all over A poisonous frog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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