What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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Q:Why couldn't little Bobby read the bible? A: His parents weren't into religion and he was blind

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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A mother had three kids: 1st kid- “Mom, why did you name me Daisy?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a daisy fell on your head.” 2nd kid- “Mommy, why did you name me Rose?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a rose fell on your head.” 3rd kid- “Blahblahblahflismdjsk” *makes retarded noises* Mom- “SHUT UP BRICK!”

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Jeez Bill, how drunk was I last night? You took my pet parakeet, threw it at my daughter's piggy bank and yelled "ANGRY BIRDS!!!!"

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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What do you call a black man in a hole? "sir". He is A colnel in the US marines fighting for his country in a pivotal battle to maintain american interests in other countries.

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What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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Why was the girl distressed by the photo of her boyfriend's mutilated corpse? Because it was out of focus.

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Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

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A chink walks into a bar. She is spotted by the secret police and instantly deported. Vote UKIP

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I really wish That I wasn't color blind

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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