What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

like most people my age. im 27

a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

Knock Knock Who did that?

Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...