Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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A pony goes to the doctor saying his throat hurts, the doctor sais "oh I know, your a little hoarse". The pony replies, no I'm not ass-hole I have strep throat.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a jam sandwich

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What looks like a smiley face no serously what I want to know

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Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

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whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

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scraggle is in you pillow case

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why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What's the difference between Little Billy and Ice Cream? People like Ice Cream.

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What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike they both taste good

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How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

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Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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