Why could susan not get up? Because her limbs were hacked off by a African militia group.

Why are hurricanes named after women? They're wet and wild when they come and take your car and house when they leave.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

What do you call an arab with a beard? How cares what his name is just shoot him!

A man goes to his doctor and asks: ""What is wrong with me doc? One moment I think I am a teepee, the next moment I a, a wigwam." To which the doctor responds: "I have told you several times sir; you have stage IV pancreatic cancer."

A russian gives away vodka.

Why can't basketball players play hockey? Because hockey and basketball season occur at the same time.

Why did the Little girl fell off the swing? A: Because she had no arms. And why did she fell again? A: Because her parents laugh about it and ride her again.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office, naked but wrapped in Saran Wrap. The Doctor takes one look at him and says, "I can clearly see your nuts."

I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

Why does the boy like ice-cream? It tastes good.

Hey Bill, did you know we have a black guy in our family tree? Really? Yeah, he's still hanging there

What did one door say to the other door? Nothing, cause doors don't talk.

What did the penis say to the vagina? Cover me, im going in.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

How do you confuse a blonde?? Throw her in a circle room and tell her to find all the corners If she comes out and says I found the corners.. then your screwed

How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

Hey are you from tennessee? Because I recognize your accent and I grew up there also.

24

Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

Whats worse than losing your phone? Buying a new one and then losing that

Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

Your mom is so dumb that she had a below average score on her IQ test.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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