A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

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What would you call the jetsons if they were black? Niggers

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why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

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What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

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A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

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What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

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why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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How do you make an Indian explode? Push the red button

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What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

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How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

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Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

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What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

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A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

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My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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