Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

An orphan falls off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A lot eh?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what did the left foot say to the right foot? Nothing, feet don't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are Red Violets are blue Shut up I'm watching Re-runs of FRIENDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: Who would win in a fight, Chuck Norris, or a Tank? A: Chuck Norris, because his hidden fist in his chin gives him 3 fists to the tank's 0.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -7

a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call an blonde, brunette, and a redhead? There has yet to be a definition for a group of people categorized by hair color.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's worse than getting AIDS? shaking hands with a liberian doctor. Knock Knock Who's there? Ebola

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did the person die? He was 90 years old and was sick. Its natural

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What does a black person call black friday? Friday.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

there once was a man, he was old, and he had one wish...do you wanna know that wish? Well i don't know it because he died two seconds ago from a heart attack. Oh Well...

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a group with one Jew and three Germans? Friends

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A white man, a black man, and a brown man are all in an elevator. The white man laughs "this is like the start to a racist joke or something." The other two men strangle him because he is white.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from a young age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled it up, slightly spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in a high security prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse and paedophillia. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

You know what really grinds my gears? Insufficient lubricant.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops