How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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a duck was clearing out his apartment when he came across a rat. the rat turned into a genie. 'i will grant you 3 wishes' said the genie. 'whats the catch?' replied the duck 'can i touch your dinkle?'

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Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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Knock knock. Who's there? To To Who? To Whom.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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Whats worse than losing your entire family in a car accident? Luikimia

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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You're Mom is Dead She was killed by a Grammer Nazi for me misspelling Your

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What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

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Q)what do you call a homless a man ?? A) dunno ask him what his name it (LOL RANDOMZZZ)

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What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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What do call a spoon that doesn't work? Broken.

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

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What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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