what has a hard shaft and an even harder head? A hammer

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

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What goes up a hill with 4 legs and comes down with 3? A horse, which, upon reaching the top of the hill, has one of its legs chopped off, which is when the horse proceeds down the hill.

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Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

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Why did mallisa get to go to the bar instead of jeremy... jeremy has prostate cancer and he needs to be examined every 2 1/2 minuites plus he's 7 years old.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

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rent a cops

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welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

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My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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A man is a joke for making a joke on antijoke

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What happened to the lady? She queefed.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

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Yesterday, I was assasinated.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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How do you get dislikes on anti-joke.com? You can dislike your own post from several different IP addresses.

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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