What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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who is smarter than a human? a nerd

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A man with ADD walks into a bar. He then.......Damn Nature, you scary!

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Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

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what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

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whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

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What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

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Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

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I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNET! WELCOME TO FÅG! DIE X-FÅGGOT! XD Okay Fagneto`s roll me out of here, I am done with the super important last message to uh... You? No wait that sounds wrong, stop laughing you korean piece of... Seriously sorry I am drugged, you guys put enough valium in me to kill a cow, so please roll me out... I used to have a lot of korean friend you know, but then I killed them for being korea... seriously my fingers magically type shit when I am done, please roll me out of here, and fill that... Kundalini express? Is it me or did this get even more fagneto... Get me out of here now now now no

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the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

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What tastes worse than dog shit? White dog shit.

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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Why was the girl distressed by the photo of her boyfriend's mutilated corpse? Because it was out of focus.

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Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

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What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

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What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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