Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

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How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

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I am thinking of a number between 1 and 100 what is it There are many numbers between 1 and 100 so it is highly unlikely that I will guess the right number

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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how do you know if a fish is gay? you ask it

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theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

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What did the anorexic order for dinner? Nothing

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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Why didn't the priest move in with the two rabbi? Because having three adults between the ages of 18 and 65 occupying the dwelling would have violated their insurance policy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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