My cat just died.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

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What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

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A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

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I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

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The chickens have become self-aware!

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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