If you're having girl problems, I feel bad for you, son... Because I can empathise with you, and it's not a very nice situation to be in. Hope you work it out.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man is driving the speed limit of 55 on the highway. He gets pulled over and the cop says, "Do you know how fast you were going sir?" The man replies "Well yes I was going 55, the speed limit." The cop says, "No you were going 80." The speedometers broken.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

OMG SOHPIE IS SOOOOO GREAT AT BLOWING Josh Brown xoxo

thumb_up thumb_down -5

It was the week of the school formal and a girl rang up her date and said I don't have a dress for the formal. He said ok the lets go out and buy one. So they went to the dress shop to buy one but the line was really, really long so they waited in the dress line for ages and ages until they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. As they did, the girl said well I suppose you need a suit, so they went to the suit shop, and again, the suit line was really long but they waited in the suit line and they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. Then the guy said, well if we want to go to the formal in style, then we will need a limo. So they went to the limo shop but the limo line was really long as well. But again, they waited in the limo line and they got to the front, paid and left. It was finally the night of the formal, she had her dress, he had his suit and they arrived in their limo. Everyone was having a great time and the the girl said to her partner, I'm a bit thirsty could you please get me a drink? So the guy went over to the drinks table and went to get a glass of punch but there was no punch line.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did dyslexic Old McDonald say? . . . I have a learning disability that impairs my fluency and comprehension accuracy in being able to read and spell

thumb_up thumb_down -5

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats red and goes round and round? A baby in the garbage disposal

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: A ladie not working in the kitchen A: WTF dude thats just terrible

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -5

how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -5

In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red Violets are red I have Ebola

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's better then one dead baby in a tub? Many things a dead baby is a tragedy.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops