Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

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Why did the blind man laugh at the book. He didn't

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

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I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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