What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

A young boy is crying in the park, when priest walks up to him -What's the matter son? -My parents died in a horrible car accident 2 weeks ago and now i'm held in an abusive household.

what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

A Jew with a boner runs into a wall, what hits first? His nose

I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

God is real.

An African American walks into a bar. The bar tender is a racist, so he asks the African American gentleman to leave.

What do you call a blonde person? By her name.

Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

What's more disturbing than finding an apple in your worm? The fact that you're eating a worm.

yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21

Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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