A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

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"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't give you time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

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a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have cancer."

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roses r nice violet are fine all be the 6 and you be 9

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What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

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What's more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Go-carts

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What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

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Whats the difference between platinum blondes? Absolutley nothing they all look exactly the same.

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Holy mother moley! Britain just brexited! Now there's no more Britain. Britain is all gone.

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A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

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If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

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What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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Why was the blonde sad? Her phone was broken due to an NNEMP.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

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Why did the boy fart on his sister? Because he was sitting on her, and happened to pass gas.

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

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Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

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Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

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Why couldn't the towel talk? Because it didn't have a language.

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despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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