Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

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Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

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What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

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What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

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What do you call a black man, an asian man, and a white man walking down the street? 3 men walking down the street.

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What did the jew say to the black man? I'm jewish

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Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

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It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's actually a bird. You can see its wings flapping.

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Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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What is the difference between a ginger and a pile of bricks? nothing. nothing at all.

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How many sumo wrestlers does it take to lift a huge rock? The point of lifting a rock just to lift a rock is stupid, so why would you get 3 sumo wrestlers to come out and waste their time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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