One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

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What's the difference between a fat boy and a thin boy? Fizzy drinks!

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Roses are red Violets are blue This website is dumb Your mom is going to kill you

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One, two, three, four and five

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A: That's a catchy song! B: You know what else is catchy? A: What? :) B: Herpes. Awkward silence.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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what did the little boy say to his sibling? dat not funny!

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Roses are Blue Violets are red, I need to go the the bathroom

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

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What did the man with no head get for Christmas? Nothing he was dead

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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Why did the man get in a car accident? Because he was blind.

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What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigga

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Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

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You know what a thief's kid receive on christmas? Your bike!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your best friend. No it's not, you stupid repo man...I'M NOT OPENING THE DOOR.

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What did God say to Adam and Eve? Be fruitful

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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