why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

What do you call a black man repairing a car? A mechanic who has worked very hard to gain his qualifiaction.

whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

The number 69 is? Just a plain old number that has just as much meaning as 68 and 70.

Why did the flight attendant look scared every time every time she saw a muslim get on the airplane? Because her family got murdered in front of her before she came to work

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

What do you call Mexicans who go to jail? Criminals.

How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because the The husband told her to...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...