Wake up in the morning feeling like... Helen Keller

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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Q: what happens if a black guy says hi person? A: he says hi person

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What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

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Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

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BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

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What's worse than the holocaust? nothing it was a terrible act in history

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What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

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I like that, but why am I happy?

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jews

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So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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The bartender says "We don't serve time travellers here". Two time travellers walk into a bar.

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How do you drown a blond girl? Forcibly hold her head under water until it enters the lungs and prevents the absorption of oxygen leading to cerebral hypoxia and myocardial infarction.

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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What's worse than falling in the mud whilst wearing a suit? Burying your parents.

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Why was the blonde so dumb? Because she came from a very poor family and could not afford a decent education

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How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

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what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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