What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

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What is the difference between a duck. One of its legs are both the same.

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Face down, ass up. Thats the way I like to sleep

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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Why were Billy's parents laughing at him? Because he was just diagnosed with cancer!

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Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

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Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

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What do Jesus, The Easter Bunny, and Santa Claus all have in common? Their middle names are all Larry.

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whats white and if it fell from a tree it would kill you ? Pat Butcher

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Q: What would George Washington do if he were alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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So you into art? You been to Louvre by the way?

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What has a beard and bombed the World Trade Center? Osama Bin Ladin. No, but seriously he's a terrorist.

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If you listen to Justin Beiber all day long, what do you become? Very hungry and thirsty. And you need to go to the restroom.

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Your mother is so fat, she developed diabetes and was rushed to hospital. She might not make it.

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How much weight can an ant carry up a mole hill? Ice cream has no bones.

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What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

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Every time I walk across the street I do the Hitler march and raise my arm straight out to salute him, if I feel like holding up traffic, I take smaller steps

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I'd tell you a joke about Uganda but it wouldn't be worth it as it probably would keep a low score and possibly even get deleted for staying a week with a negative rating, for a number of reasons including that it isn't particularly funny, it was copied from another website and it is slightly racist. Taking into account what most people look for in a joke, it doesn't necessarily meet their needs and would more than likely fall into a lame category. And for that reason I have not submitted it.

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Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

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Knock knock stop knocking you idiot, it's the 21st century

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yo mamas so fat whenever she wears a pink bathing suit people say "look at that fat lady wearing a pink bathing suit!

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I swear to god it wasn't me! Dont swear to god its a sin !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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