Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

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Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

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give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

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once upon a time there was a chicken, it crossed a road however unlikely this chicken has become famed for its crossing and will be hailed for eternity. through the chickens actions thus the first anti joke was born

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Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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charly ate an apple. the apple was filled with poison and charly died.

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what is the difference between a blond and a red head? one is has blond hair and one has red hair

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What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

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What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophobe a blow job

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Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

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so today i took a poop. hehe

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What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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