"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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What is the difference between a black baby and a tractor? A tractor is heavy and a baby is not

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Holocaust. I was too lazy to make it complete, so enjoy the punchline and comment your own question. It will probably be funnier.

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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A man did not like this site

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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Jerry Sandusky walks into an Under 21

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Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

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Do Re Mi Fa So La Ti Only musicians will understand.

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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Why did the plane crash? Because a loaf of bread was the pilot.

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A Jew with a boner runs into a wall, what hits first? His nose

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Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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What is blue and has to deal with a vagina. Blue waffle you know who has that Jews But the jews got it from the gassing and the gassing got it from hitlers wifes piss but the blue waffle came from the lesbian she had sex with when she was doing her lesbian phase but the lesbian got it from her father and the father got it from his wife.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Yo mama so stupid, she scored poorly on her SAT exams in high school. She was unable to recieve a college education. She now works as a full time waitress at a small diner. She earns minimum wage and is still getting nowhere on her search for a better job.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? Humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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