Q. How do you know when you've had too much too drink? A. Your dead(No because when your dead you can't think.)

What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

sadf

chuck norris threw a grande and killed 50 people then the grande blew up

A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

You know what's good for shoulder pain? If you ice on for 20 minutes then off for 20 minutes repetitively three times a day

what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

What's difficult and tedious to do? Trying to find a joke with 0 thumbs up/down -Sykes

What did the abortion clinic serve at the cafeteria? Fetus soup

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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