Knock Knock who's there docter docter who??? YOU JUST SAID IT DUMBO!!!!!! lolololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the dog do in the phone booth? Nothing, as dog do not have opposable thumbs and cannot grip objects. The previous user must have left the door open and the dog walked in, only to leave a few moments later.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, technically speaking, chickens lack the capability to cross said road because chances are that it was a highway because highways cover 64% of america's roads. This being said, the possibility of a chicken being able to cross is is highly improbable. So to answer the question.... BACON!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I have a little dog. She likes being tossed high into the air. I need a new little dog as the last one was caught by a gust carrying here over the sound-dividing highway wall and dropped into traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

thumb_up thumb_down +8

"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

thumb_up thumb_down +8

cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What's blue and smells like grass? A: Blue grass.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops