If John had 4 apples and gave 2 to Mary, what is the circumference of the sun?

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

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Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

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What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

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A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

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Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

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Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

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Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

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Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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the power to turn magnetism into light

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what's worse than the holocaust the man who thought of it

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops