Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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Why did the blonde fail her science test? Because she spent all day at the hair salon getting her hair died from brown to blonde when she should have spent the time productively studying.

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

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Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

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A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

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A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

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What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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What's the difference between an Asian bookkeeper and a Jewish dog? This isn't a joke, it's an assignment for school, I need to write a 3 page paper on this. Any ideas?

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What did the bartender say to the three-legged Irishman? What can I get you?

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know because he got hit by a car.

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Yo mamma's so fat she has her own zip code!!! :) Well... the actual reason is she is filthy rich and her house is so big that it takes up a bunch of room, and now that im talking about her i really wanna be her even though shes fat!

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Roses are red I got a new phone But no one to text Forever alone

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

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What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

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Q: what do you call a deer with no eyes A; roadkill

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops