why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

if you can read this you dont' need glasses

Q: What do you say when you see your T.V. floating at night? A: That's so frickin awesome

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got Alzheimer's, Who are you?

Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

a gay man got shot outside his house even though he was just checking the male get it checking the male

Why did Sally fall off the Empore State Building? Her mother threw a refrigerator at her. -BG

what do hookers and bungee jumping have in common? They are both 100$ to be in/on and if the rubber breaks your screwed

What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It depends on the person. To generalize and select one sport to represent the entire race would be stereotyping.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

WHY DID THE MAN RUN A MILE?.BECAUSE HE WAS TRYING TO CATCH HIS NOSE AND GET A TISSUE

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

So a little girl walked into a bar... A concerned adult then told the bartender. The bartender's name was Jim. Jim then asked the girl if she knew her phone number. The little girl said nothing and the bar tender was perplexed at the petrified look on the girls face. Jim the bartender then called the police and explained the situation.Once the girl was brought back to the police station it was learned that she had been missing for three months in a nearby county. The police then return to the bar to find that the owner had multiple kidnapped little girls in a cage under the bar that only he and the kidnapped girls knew about before the cops and Jim the bartender discovered it. The police then arrested The owner of the bar. He stood trial and was senteced to death row, he remains there today.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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