Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

A white kid, a black kid, and an Asian kid all try out for the basketball team. Which one makes the team? All of them, because they are all very good.

whats the difference from a jew and a christian the jew got arrested for rape

There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

Have you heard the one about the Priest, the Pastor, and the Mail Man? -no, how's that go? Oh you haven't? That's too bad, it's really good.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

What happens when you give a fat man scissors? He cuts off the foreskin of your penis.

why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

Whats green and miss centowski hates a gas chamber :D lets be friends

yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

Jimmy Saville

what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? The light was red, which prompted the chicken to cross safely.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

whats worse than failing your maths test?

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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