What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

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What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

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How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

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Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

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why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. why;d the banana fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

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What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops