Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

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What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

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What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

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One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

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What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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Why do all black men carry guns? They don't. That is a stereotype. Now pants on the other hand, that's a different story.

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops