What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

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If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

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Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

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Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Because she had no arms!

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Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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What's the best Anti-Joke ever? I don't know, but it's NOT this one.

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Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

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Why can't you teach drivers ed and sex ed at the same time in Iraq? The camel would get tired.

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Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

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LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

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"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

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'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

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What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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whats worst then geting a used condom put in your mouth geting wraped by mario then lugi

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Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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