How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

What's white, black, red, and flies? An airplane pilot with a battleaxe driven into his head

How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know... I thought no one knew the answer to that question...

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

Q:What happens when you mix Justin Bieber with a women? A: Well, since is a very highly impossible circumstance, I have no need to give a name for this.

my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

How old are you? 7

jd and zach loves vigina

What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

Laughter and joy... You are really sweet you know.. Excuuuse me princess! But Like Mickey Mouse never changed... From a Potato peeler to some fuckup private detective in a trenchcoat. So tell me, what character did Walt Disney draw before Mickey Mouse?

What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

Q: What was the name of the armless elf in Snow White? A: Stumpy

Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

THE LOVE SHACK IS A LITTLE OLD PLACE WHERE WE CAN GET TOGETHER!

What succeeds most of the time? The population of a field with grass.

Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

A man was walking down the sidewalk. Then he turned into a drugstore.

Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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