Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

Butterfly is standing on a flower. Cow comes and steps on that flower

roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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