Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

a blind man walks into a wall

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

Why was the hasidic so stupid? He wasn't. He died in the holocaust.

How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

What do you call a spider with no legs? A spider.

flink geit, nei ikkke kneck bena hans jeh er på "forgiftnings avdelingen" third flor deen ask arund I mena i am the ønly guy in the world named Angelo Nero, so ull find me, srsly, got some ritalin on u? Do not respond, u know am not into drugz, but i waanna stay awak, get the detailz, remembeeer if you kicke his nuts, you get paid, if not go back. God jobb gutta, seriøst, kaffipiller ritalin, stimulanter? Not opiats, come with my phon so i can fuuk this netwerk,.. Ps: Okay break his leg, but ust one, hurry up remembr, cut his tungue (it grows bak jes) then tell dem you save him, you can be heroews, goat, tell fingern that when im bak, we are takin a trip on da limo, galz included becuz Mr.Black is the gentz. NO MOR REPLYES whre u? I want my phone not answrs her. Nero is a fucking demoppsn

A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

your mama's so fat she wears big clothing

What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

pants on the ground pants on the ground lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground

question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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