Bitch your as two-faced as Doduo

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A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

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"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

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two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

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I C U P White stuff

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What do you call a cow lying on a barn floor? A cow

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What bouriquet got to do open HIS FACEBOOK!

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Q: What did the blind boy get for his birthday? A: He doesn't know

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How many light bulbs? 1

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Yes!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!! Yes!!!

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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Hey I Just Met You , & This Is Crazy , But Here's My Status , So Like It Maybe ?

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

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How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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Q: What's small, round, and looks like a marble? A: A marble.

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The new Minons film reminds me of most foreign films.. You can't undertand a fucking word they say and they're all yellow

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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