POOP.....People Order Our Patties

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

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I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

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Yo momma's so stupid... she scored poorly on on the SAT, failed to get into a good college, worked at a walmart and lived an otherwise mundane life.

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How do a jew, an African, and u white man stop a train? They pull the breaks

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Dave. Dave, who? Dave, your neighbor, I ran out of eggs making a quiche, could I borrow a few?

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Your wife died during the delivery.

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Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

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Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

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Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

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A black man, a white man, and an Asian man walk into a bar. The black man says, "My wife died in a terrible book-keeping accident.". The white man says, "My wife died in a terrible lightbulb-sorting accident.". The Asian says, "My wife died in a terrible geography accident.". Soon after, the bar was hit by a missile, promptly killing the three men.

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I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

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That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

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What's worse than the Holocost? Two worms in your apple.

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What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

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How do you confuse a chicken? Paint yourself black and throw seeds at it.

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Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Exercise

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Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

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What is yellow and fluffy? Green fluff, I lied about the yellow part.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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