What do you call a spider with no legs? A spider.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

the only people that will miss whitney huston are her drug dealer and possibly bobby brown

thumb_up thumb_down -37

There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Who's Micheal Jackson?

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Knock Knock! Who's there? Reclu. Reclu who? Recluse Spider.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Mum did you make my milkshake? No, I didn't son, but your father did. Fther's dead. I know.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer..... Just Kidding! He got a bike!

thumb_up thumb_down -37

How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Why did the pengoon cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -39

what's worse than dropping half your sandwich? Getting hit in the face with a sledgehammer

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

It's likely that very few people will read this.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

thumb_up thumb_down -39

what did old retarded autistic ginger kid get for his birthday? i dont know thats why i asked

thumb_up thumb_down -39

what goes ha ha ha ..plop? We are all going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Why do women wear perfume and makeup? They smell bad and they're ugly.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Who looks like a bird and can fly to hogwarts? Dean McKee. his scar is f u c k i n g rotten

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops