What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

guess what what ...

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

What happened when the football player couldn't get his Coke from the vending machine? He got angry.

How many black men can you fit into a mini? Five One in the drivers seat. One in the passenger seat. And three in the back seats. Anymore would be both dangerous and impractical due to the small interior volume of the car, and it would also put a significant strain on the cars limited engine power. Especially when tackling a steep incline.

A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

Why did Bob drop his ice cream? Because he got hit with a super models TIttys

A successful, articulate, charming, well mannered, rich, young man walks into a bar.... Every night

Why did the chicken cross the road? AIDs.

A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

Whats long hard and full of semen? A dick.

You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

So there were these two ovens in a muffin. One oven said "Holy fuck it's muffiny in here." The other oven said "Holy fuck a talking oven!"

what do you call lots of jews on a train? Call them what you want they aren't coming back!

Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

Why do fat people commit suicide

What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

Knock knock. Who isn't there? Not me. Don't come in. I won't.

What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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