A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

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What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

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wat does T.J.C.S. Mean? leave an comment to answer

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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big fat hairy gigantic enourmous erectionn CC

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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How can you tell the difference between a black guy and a white guy? skin color

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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How did the Jew escape the concentration camp?

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What do you get from M&M bags? M&Ms.

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Why did the man get in a car accident? Because he was blind.

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What did the boy say after he got hit by a bus? Nothing. He's dead.

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2 Men Walk Into A Bar, I Forget The Rest.

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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There were two bagels sitting on a table in Denny's. One bagel turns to the other and says, "So how did that job interview go?" The other replies, "It went great, thanks".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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