A guy, arriving at the pearly gates of Heaven, asks St. Peter "Why did I die? Why me." St. Peter replies: "You died the same way everyone does. Lack of oxygen to the brain."

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what do you call a dog with no legs. It dosent matter it wont come

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there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

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Whats funny? Your face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause it wanted to

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Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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find the o 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duh its up top

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

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Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

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Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

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What is my name? I dont know

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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Why was the hasidic so stupid? He wasn't. He died in the holocaust.

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why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

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What do you call a spider with no legs? A spider.

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

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flink geit, nei ikkke kneck bena hans jeh er på "forgiftnings avdelingen" third flor deen ask arund I mena i am the ønly guy in the world named Angelo Nero, so ull find me, srsly, got some ritalin on u? Do not respond, u know am not into drugz, but i waanna stay awak, get the detailz, remembeeer if you kicke his nuts, you get paid, if not go back. God jobb gutta, seriøst, kaffipiller ritalin, stimulanter? Not opiats, come with my phon so i can fuuk this netwerk,.. Ps: Okay break his leg, but ust one, hurry up remembr, cut his tungue (it grows bak jes) then tell dem you save him, you can be heroews, goat, tell fingern that when im bak, we are takin a trip on da limo, galz included becuz Mr.Black is the gentz. NO MOR REPLYES whre u? I want my phone not answrs her. Nero is a fucking demoppsn

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A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops