the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

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1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. It is a gun store and he needs to buy amunition after using all of his to fend of a home invader, and protect his family. He lives in a bad area because he never went to college and cannot get a well paying job in this economy, so he can't afford to buy a house in a better area He then used the gun to rob a bank. He no longer lives in a poor area

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why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

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Who will win in a fight Chuck Norris or Chuck Norris? I don't even know who he is -Lets go METS!!!!!!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

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Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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