Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

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There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

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Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

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How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

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What are annoying? Ads.

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Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

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Charlie Sheen

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Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

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scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

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Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

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a brick cheats on another brick the brick finds out and dose nothing because it is a brick

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H2O." The second man, quite thirsty, says "I would like some H2O too." The second man dies because the bartender is a serial killer and gave the man the hydrogen peroxide he ordered. The first man is killed with a shovel.

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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