When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

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Text this number just cuz 16305208722

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Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

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Andoni was here

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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What do you call a black man wearing tights? Rick

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

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Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

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Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

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I had 99 problems Solved them all

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What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

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How do you stop the London riots? - You employ a a highly effective police tactic to diffuse the crisis as quickly as possible.

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Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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A wise man once said a journey of a thousand steps starts with one step. The wise man also smoked weed and starved to death in a cave.

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Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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