What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener.

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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What do you get when you cross a cow with an elephant? A deformed organism

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Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Your mom is soo black , she can go naked to a funeral.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are also red, "Honey, please call the fire department!"

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If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

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Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

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Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

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Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

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happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

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Apple hates Blackberry.

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Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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