Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at his genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

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what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

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Why wouldnt you want to hit a black man that is on a bike with your car? It mite be your bike

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What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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Yo' Mama's so old that her age is over the average age of most people.

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Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

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Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

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Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

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Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

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Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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