knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

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im a policeman the car infront of me had a foot hanging out of the trunk. i pulled him over. i closed the trunk and proceeded to inform him of the dangers of open trunks.

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

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2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

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What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

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A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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Why was a black man in a police car? He is a police officer.

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: seven raped six's mom

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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