a person who will soon die of beeties

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Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

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Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

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what is sadder than lost in a ps4 game ? Your mom's funeral, she died in a horrible accident yesterday

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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How do u kill a gay man? Shoot him in the head

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A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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What's the difference between a clever trick and a computer programmer? A clever trick throws you for a loop, and a computer programmer throws you a for loop.

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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Where di mary go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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Q. What do you get when you put a Jew and Adolf Hitler in the same room? A. Trouble

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What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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