Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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why does the man appear fat he is

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Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

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What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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justin beiber is having intimate sex with a woman.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

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I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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Why is the sky blue? You like men.

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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A dancer walks into a barre

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? A second one

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

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whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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