Why did the man go to Chinatown? Because he was hungry.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

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If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? it was dead.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

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A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

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Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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i like potatoes But only mashed baked are a little bad they arent tasty. I like food good because food bad can really hurt me

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!" Passersby notice the man is blind, which caused him not to notice the bar. He later died in the hospital from severe head trauma

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im jewish

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Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

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Q:What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? A: It varies. But most dental offices are open for service between 8am and 4pm

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A farmer goes out to the coop to feed the chickens. They're all dead.

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Why did the old man die? Because everyone dies

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Q; What's something that's long and girls like to suck? A: A popsicle

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Roses are red, Violet are blue. I just thought I'd let you know, But don't worry- this isn't a poem.

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A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

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What do you call a man which busts ghosts A ghostbuster. Duh

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

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knock knock you may come in

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A man hanged himself, leaving a note. Nobody found him, nor the note. Nobody cared for him.

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Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

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i have 2 penises

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Binladen coming to a beach near you :D

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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