One orphan said to the other, 'what are your parents called'

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knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

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Everyone lies about agreeing to the terms of service... look, I'll do it right now! because i have to click it in order to post the joke.

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What's worse than being human? Nothing... No I literally mean nothing at all. Like not being anything?

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"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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What happened when the terrorist with a bomb went into a school. He blew up and everyone died.

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What's the difference of a team of black people and a pile of shit? None. Kelvin Yang.

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What’s the best part about winning a gold medal? Nothing. You’re on acid and staring straight at the sun.

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knock, knock no one answers man goes home and shots himself because he feels alone

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Hey, come here often? No.

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Want to hear a joke? Sorry, you're looking at the wrong website.

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Why do Jews have big noses? Because it is genetic.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Die bitch

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A black man is playing guitar for a white man and a chinese man. After he is finished playing the white man and chinese man compliment him on his nice playing.

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"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

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A person walks into a store. He goes to a worker an asks "were is the potatos?" . The worker says, there on that shelf.

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What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

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What do you call a Black Comedian? Funny, You Racist.

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A very depressed man walks into a bar, sits down, and gives the bartender his credit card and says, "Keep giving me beers until I pass out." The bartender asks, "What's wrong Buddy? You can talk to me!" The depressed man explains that he was fired, his wife has been cheating on him for the past 2 years, both his daughters ran away and became prostitutes, his mother died after choking on his father's Genitals and the father had just been diagnosed with both brain and testicular cancer and will die within the week, his sister was kidnapped and sold into a sex slave market and has been missing for the past year, his brother confessed to being gay and committed suicide with his lover (male) after learning that their state did not accept gay marriage. He pauses to drink his beer, then continues on to say that he has been convicted of sexually assaulting a child even though he was innocent, his dog had just been run over by a tractor trailer with no physical body left to bury, his cat had gotten stuck in the garbage disposal and he turned it on without knowledge that the cat was sleeping inside. The man looks at the bartender and started to laugh and cry at his misfortune, he then said,"... And to top it all off i just spent the past 2 hours explaining this to a deaf bartender!" The man then went home and hung himself on the telephone pole outside his house. At the funeral only the bartender,who attended, spoke on his behalf, reciting the man's terrible life, then ending by saying, "This man death has motivated me to search for a cure to this rare Delusional Disorder."

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Black Poeple

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Q: What's annoying and doesn't smoke? A: AIDS

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no

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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