Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

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a mexican guy, a jewish guy, and a priest jump off a plane they landed safely and had a great day

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WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

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rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

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What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

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Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

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Yo mama is so stupid that see should really be concerned with furthering her education in a four-year university

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knock knock. "who's there?" dick. "dick who?" dick ferns.

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Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

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What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

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What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Sally had no arms. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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Whites black white and red all over? The nazi flag.

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One morning a guilty man reluctantly told his wife he was having an affair. After a long awkward silence they were then abducted by aliens.

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theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man? The black man eats chicken.

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Want to know a joke? There is no joke.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

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Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

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What's grey and can't fly? A castle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops