Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

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What is purple pink and goes over 10000 miles per hour. Barnney in a tornado

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Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

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Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

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Why do Asians get 50% off on movies? They don't.

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there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

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You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

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why did Kanye interrupt Taylor Swift at the VMA's? because he had a little too much scotch before the ceremony

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A good way to remember which one is Beavis and which one is Butthead is to remember the acronym "Baby Blues." B in baby stands for Beavis, and b in blues stands for Butthead. You're welcome.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

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An Irishman, a German, a Jew, and a Mexican walk into a bar...... the Irishman is named designated driver and all four have a safe and enjoyable evening.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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What noise does a Chinese roller coaster make? Chink Chink Chink Chink chink.....

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

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What did the horse say to the other horse? neh

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

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A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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