Terry was always struggling with mathematics. On his last report card he received a D- in math. His parents were naturally very upset with him because they knew their son could do much better and so did Terry. Terry wanted to make his parents proud so he buckled down and started studying on a regular basis. Terry realized his had work had payed off when his 3rd grade teacher handed him his report card. Terry had revived an A in math! On his walk home from school all he could think about was how proud his mom and dad were going to be. On that walk home Terry was savagely torn apart by an escaped lion from the local zoo. His head was never found.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So you are "The Nero" are you not? How ironic... ...I got nothing on you, let me ask you however, why did you quit the underground society? What changed your lifestyle so much? I mean I accept that you did not do it out of fear or cowardice, but why did you leave it up to the rest of us to try to hold together the last remains of freedom and social information? What? To use your techniques in order to entrance people into buying your books? How is that so different? I am not saying that I consider your methods lesser, because nobody here does, but if you can explain how this makes you better, I would appreciate it, I am certain that most people would.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy jump off a bridge. Who hits the ground first? It doesn't matter. They are all going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's a foot long and slippery, a slipper

thumb_up thumb_down +3

http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What word is 7 letters long, is composed of the letters N,G,G,E,R, and S, and stands for a group of people who annoy the crap out of you? NAGGERS.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

little potato when born allicator don't have neck, if u like me it's cause u stole my scooter

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo mama's so fat that she needs substantially larger clothes than most other people

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the mother say when her sons asked for a can of pop? No you have diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the boy say after he stubbed his toe? Owww! I wanna have sex!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How come the bartender didnt let the black guys in the bar Because the bar was closed.noone was aloud in the bar

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls over.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

No, Sarah. You know your hooks scratch the keys.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Holocaust jokes suck. Anne frankley, I won't stand for them

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops