what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names

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What did the black kid say to the white kid My parents are slaves

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There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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Ok soo theres a Jewish Guy, a Christian Guy and a Gay Guy. The Jewish Guy goes Amen The Christian Guy goes Ámen The Gay Guy goes Ammeeeennn

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

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What do call a spoon that doesn't work? Broken.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

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Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

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Doctor, I keep believing I am stuck in the Matrix! Oh thats common, you know existencial crisis and so on but we got medications, you want the blue or the red pill?

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Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

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Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Whatever his name happens to be.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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