Why was the pig squealing? Because all four of its legs were tied together and it was about to have it's head chopped off so the meat could be processed for people to enjoy.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them!!!

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Did you know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes

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There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

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When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? neh

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I was jaywalking when it hit me. You know, a car.

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what do you call an elephant crossing a fish? a elephant fish

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What do you call a woman with no arms or legs that fell off a boat fucked

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why was the boy crying over his dog, his cat, and his bird? Cuz i raped them Wat about his pet hamster? I threw it at a wall

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

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What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

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Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

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An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Nothing, he also had no parents.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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