Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

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Tony Romo

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How do you wake a clown up? By pouring vinegar in his eyes.

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So a black guy goes to college and doesn't steal anything or rape anyone. He has a 4.0 GPA and is one of the smartest students at Harvard University.

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What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

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What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

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Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

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Jesse uses a prescription shampoo called " greasey poop" because he feels like his hair doesnt look greasy enough. He cries himself asleep every night because he wants a slim body like the rest of the cool kids, so he eats his pain away, which digs him an even deeper hole. the life of Jesse zigenbein is quite tragic to say the least. Please donate 10$ to the "eat ourselves to sleep" campaign

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

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what do all black jokes start with (look left look right)

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why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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What do you do if some idiot throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

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Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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What's stupid a light bulb.

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Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

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A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

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Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

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What kind of Juice do White supremacists Hate the most? Minute Maid.

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Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

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Whats worse then a worm in your apple This joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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