Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

If Alex Maitland reads this he is gay

Whats the diffrence between a white and a black guy? one of them is black

What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

what do u call a joke with no punchline? A non-harmful joke

why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

Your mother is so fat, she developed diabetes and was rushed to hospital. She might not make it.

Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

Why do thieves shower before undertaking a robbery? Probably part of their morning routine.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

why did the blue berry cross the road

What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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