I was jaywalking when it hit me. You know, a car.

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Why was the sock sad? Impossible. Socks dont have emotions.

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What do you call a woman with no arms or legs that fell off a boat fucked

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What did the Wind say to the Window? (Insert Racist punchline here)

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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Why was the pig squealing? Because all four of its legs were tied together and it was about to have it's head chopped off so the meat could be processed for people to enjoy.

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

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why was the boy crying over his dog, his cat, and his bird? Cuz i raped them Wat about his pet hamster? I threw it at a wall

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

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When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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Did you know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? neh

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What's 9 + 10 19

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What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

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What did the dinosaur say to the caveman? Nothing. Dinosaurs were wiped off the earth due to a tragic, world wide extinction about 65 million years ago while small mammals which would eventually evolve into humans survived.

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Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

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What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops