Why didn't the little boy have arms or legs? Because they were savagely ripped off of him by a black bear on a very unfortunate camping trip.

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What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

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What happened when the 16 year old told her mother she was pregnant? Her mother was extremely disappointed that her daughter did not stay faithful to an abstinent life but eventually became proud of the fact that she would soon be a grandmother.

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What did the parents say to their kid? You're adopted and we don't love you.

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Read a Book.

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whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

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"the president is black, my lambo's blue..." no hes not, hes bi-racial.

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

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See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

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Democracy.

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A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

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ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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