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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

Q:Why did the dwarf shout abuse at the bus driver? A: He had anger issues, and the price of the ticket was quite unreasonable.

If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

One morning a guilty man reluctantly told his wife he was having an affair. After a long awkward silence they were then abducted by aliens.

whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

What did the talking muffin say to the other talking muffin? Ah! A talking muffin!

What type of pants do Mario and Luigi wear? Levi or Denim, I'm not sure why but probably because you can get a nice fitting pair for only a couple of bucks.

yo mummas so FAT to get to the other side

Two lifelong friends walk into the locl Bar and each order a Beer. " So how's life treating ya?" Phil replies, " Well Doug, I've got Stage Four Lung Cancer. I'm going to Die, remember?" Unfortunately, Doug doesn't remember because Doug has a Brain Tumor.

there are three women witch one is married? the one with the ring on its finger

Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

What did Facebook say to Twitter, and twitter to blogg ant blogg to youtube? nothing. They cant talk..

Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

What is funny about a cod swimming around alone in the ocean? Nothing, over-fishing is a huge problem in the modern day.

Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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