First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

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What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

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Why was Jimi's mom sad? Because Jimi suddenly fell to the floor clenching his neck while saying "I'm Dying!"

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Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

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This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

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Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

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U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

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I gotta friend named Michael Nugyen and he dishonored his family. Did I mention he was asian ( he live in tampa fl )

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What is the difference between a person with Alzheimer's and Aids? 24!

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

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Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Nothing. I killed them both with a fire axe and proceeded to kill all the patients in the hospital.

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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Why couldn't the towel talk? Because it didn't have a language.

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Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

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Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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