Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

A man walks into a pizza place and orders a pizza. When he got the pizza, he saw it had pepporonis on it. He liked that, so he ate the pizza.

Q:What's the greatest part about having sex with twenty five year old girls? A: There's 20 of them

When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

why was one black guy surrounded by ten white guys...... he was a story teller.

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

It was a chilly saturday afternoon coles's brother asked cole to baby sit cole said yes and when his brother left cole proceeded to give it to his niece in the ass. Little did cole know he said his little niece on fire that was the end of his little nieces life.

What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

If your canoe is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon. False, snakes don't have armpits

How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

Guess what I was with your mom last night so I wraped her in foil and put her in the oven.

why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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