Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Why did the blonde jump off the bridge? She was clinically depressed and wanted to end her life

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

Three Kids dressed as a bear, a chicken, and a penguin walk into a bar. The bartender asks the to leave as they are all under the legal drinking age.

What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CAsQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fhomepage.eircom.net%2F~cronews%2Felep%2Felep.html&ei=1aAjVMrJJcePoQS99ILADg&usg=AFQjCNEy4qvnhug3LTGYLGylpoRhxjk_zg

How do you fit a giraffe into a refrigerator? You cut it into pieces.

Why did the car break down? Because breakfast was done.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

A man is driving down the highway. He falls asleep at the wheel due to his case of narcolepsy, and dies in a fiery car crash.

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

whats worse than getting hit whit a baseball? getting hit by a train

What happened when a Black man ran into a white supremacist? They exchanged insurance information

What do you get when you cross a spider with a cow? A dead spider.

whats the difference between an orange and a dead baby? one is a tasty treat and the other is an orange

Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

whats the difference between a ladybug and a jew? there is none

I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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