What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

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How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

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Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

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what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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"Knock knock." "Come in."

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Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

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A man finds a woman stumbling around on the street... So he asks sarcastically "what drugs are you on?" The lady starts crying and says "I was raped"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops