A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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find the o 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duh its up top

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Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

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A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well for a chicken to cross a road there would need to be a farm right next a road and, the fence in the farm would have to be torn for the chicken to get out and the chicken would probably end up not crossing the road because of cars.

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Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

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Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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Q: GUESS WHAT IS REALLY BAD????? A: TITTY CANCER! :0

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Whats funny? Your face.

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Yolo Pierre because of Etzio tickle shits faggatron and individual nut join forces to become the shit suckers

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

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Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

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Q: why is there always a window in front of the kitchen sink A: so when the woman is washing the dishes she can see the grass she is about to cut

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

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a blind man walks into a wall

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Did you hear about the guy who had his head chopped off? He's dead.

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How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

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There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

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Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

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Q: Do you know how to save a black man from drowning? A: No. GOOD!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops