How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

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What did the boy with AIDS, polio, one eye and one arm get for Christmas? Cancer.

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i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

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How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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a. get me a drink b. a would but but i got no arms

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Did you know there was a black man in my family tree? He married my aunt.

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why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

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You know what would be funny? If the Incredible Hulk asked Spiderman to change his diaper.

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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