How do you drown a blonde. Put a scratch 'n' sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

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Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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Whats better than 1 person in your oven? 9 people in your oven.

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Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

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What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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Why did the suicidal terrorist swim with fish? He heard the SEALS we coming for him.

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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Why has 8 wheels and costs more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

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What do you call a piece of Swiss cheese with human characteristics? Abnormal.

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What did the korean say to the other korean. I don't know i dont speak korean.

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Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops