Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

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Yo mamas so poor, she should probably find a source of consistent payment to support herself.

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What do you call a black man repairing a car? A mechanic who has worked very hard to gain his qualifiaction.

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What's worse than 13 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 13 trees...

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Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

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a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

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their was a black man in my family tree hes still hanging on

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

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A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

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How did the man kill the black fly? He called the KKK fly and had it lynch the black fly

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Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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What's white and gluey Glue

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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A duck walks into a bar and buys a drink. When the bartender comes up he says put it on my bill

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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