What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already taken her police statement and she doesn't want to discuss the incidentit anymore until her lawyer arrives.

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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A B C D E F G.... Gummy bears are chasing me 1 is red, 1 is blue 1 is tryin to steal my shoe now i'm running for my life cuase the red 1 has a knife

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"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

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Why was the boy sad? because the serotonin level in his brain was significantly lower than normal.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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What do you call a girl with one leg? Eileen

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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why did your mom leave your dad because he was a drunk :l

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Why wasn't the unplugged computer on?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

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What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She didnt have any arms

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What do you call a black man sitting on a porch? Relaxed.

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Q: Whats 5+5 A:10

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Yo mama so ugly everybody died. The End.

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Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

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The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

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You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

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How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops