What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

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Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

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how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

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How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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roses are red violents are blue your dad is gay soon it all be you !

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Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

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what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

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One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

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Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

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whats worse than four babies in a box? one baby in four boxes

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Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia So do I

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Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops