Let them think that you are insane, vulnerable, and they wont bother leaking a lot of shit about you, this "shit info" will remain inaccurate and reveal weaknesses where there is none. I had to draw them away from you, but as soon as he began selling Intel regarding my missing eye, I figure our "not so friends in the unknown" would have eventually begun searching for "The one eyed man" among you. And had they not found one, they might just as likely made it seem as if there was one for the money. None of the thugs sent to attack me nor the "Nero decoys" where professionals, but those behind them sure are, considering that they paid these thugs more than what I make during a year. Gotta go pretty girl, hope we meet again in not so long. Moral: This is all a joke, get over it, Moral has left forever, mission complete.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

whats the difference between a phone and Helen Keller? you listen to the phone and you smash Helen Keller on the head with a spiked baseball bat

thumb_up thumb_down -30

This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

thumb_up thumb_down -30

why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

thumb_up thumb_down -30

im typing this without looking at the jetviard. I can;t toycg type thar wekk yet

thumb_up thumb_down -30

what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Q: How many different Pokèmon are there? A: Pokèmon aren't real.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A little boy had a candle by his bedside. It fell over. The candle was fake, and it didn't burn down his house. When he woke up, he picked up the candle, put it back on his nightstand and had a wonderful day.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why does Michael J Fox have such good handwriting? Through years of hardwork, perseverance, and rehabilitation.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down -30

We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

thumb_up thumb_down -30

If your canoe is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon. False, snakes don't have armpits

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

thumb_up thumb_down -30

twenty three roaches walk into a bar. the bar is evacuated due to insects.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Yo Mama's so fat Everyone is very concerned for her Health.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why is the sky blue during day? Because it would be night if it was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops