What happens when you get caught inside a tornado? You don't, the debris around you will most certainly kill you before you get close to the tornado.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Peter was sitting on a bench. He had a bag of 10 sweets and was eating them slowly. John and Anthony both wanted some, but Peter wanted to still have sweets left over. How many did he give them both? None. He's that selfish.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

thumb_up thumb_down -5

You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock knock Whos there? Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Who's there?! "is anyone home this is Helan Keller"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did the maker of anti jokes website say while reading some of the jokes on here? these people r idiots. and he lived happily ever after. then died. Good one

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are Red Violets are Blue In Soviet Russia Poem tells You -Ben

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Girl: What's up? Guy: If I told you, would you sit on it?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did Tim's grandma get him for his birthday? Nothing, because Tim's grandma died in a car accident 2 years ago

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the catholic preist take all the little boys out in the woods? They were going on a camping trip.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

homosexual rights to marriage

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops