What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

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TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL! Cant we just dine at McDonalds? ITS THE SAME THING! Moral: Personally I love the taste of cardboard meat...

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven. By darragh Hamilton

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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why can't johnny compete in the track race? because he has no feet.

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Knock knock... Knock knock... Knock knock... Unfortunately, nobody was home to sign for Marks parcel.

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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Maths.

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roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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