How do you stop a black man drowning? Take your foot off his head

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Did you hear why the peanut got arrested by walking next to another peanut? One got a-salt-ed

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What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

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A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

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Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red, HOLY SHIT THE GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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Joker: Why so serious Man: My mom and dad just got hit by a car, and you just stabbed my friend in the face with a pencil. Joker: Oh well im sorry to hear that.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

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Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

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the economy.

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What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

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Hey I Just Met You , & This Is Crazy , But Here's My Status , So Like It Maybe ?

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Black people are like jelly beans. Nobody likes the black one's.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

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Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

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What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

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Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

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Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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