I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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Knock knock. Who's there? To To Who? To Whom.

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What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

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What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

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Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

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Why did the princess kiss the frog? She really wanted a wart.

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What did the man with no head get for Christmas? Nothing he was dead

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A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

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What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

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What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops