Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

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What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

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I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

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Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

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In soviet Russia...things are different

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knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

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XD Jackass.

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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miha kako si?

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Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

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What did the man say when he saw his t.v. floating in the middle of the night? I must be seeing things. By logic, televisions don't float. My weary eyes must be playing tricks on me and I should probably go back to sleep.

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Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

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Why did the man put his money in the freezer? hes retarded.

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don't do anything i wouldn't do first

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Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

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What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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Oh my god it's the twinkie mobile!

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why did the blue berry cross the road

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Why couldn't Billy eat his dinner? Because a black man amputated his hands.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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