What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

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A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

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You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

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What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

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How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops