What's worse than burning your bacon? Finding your daughter decapitated and raped in the basement.

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How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

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What did the chicken say when it layed the square egg? Ouch.

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A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern p.o.r.n-o collections.

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Take part of what?

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How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

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A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

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What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

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Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

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What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

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how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

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How did Jesus walk on water? Jesus is God in the form of a man, and he is the only human being ever with the ability to perform miracles

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A black man is driving down the road in a van, and pulls up to a little a girl and says excuse me Miss. The girl replies Ok Ok I will get the car just dont hurt me The black guy says I dont want you to get in my van im taking your mom on a date.

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Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

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A man walks into a bar holding a magic lamp. The bartender asks "what are you holding?" The man says "It's a magic lamp." The bartender looks at the man and scratches his head. It turns out the bartender has had a problem with lice in his hair. If you believe in a magic genie is going to grant any wishes you're reading the wrong story. Anyways, the bartender buys medicated shampoo and no longer has head lice. The guy with the magic lamp was totally worthless.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

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If John had 4 apples and gave 2 to Mary, what is the circumference of the sun?

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops