What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

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What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he got hit by a bus. Why did he get hit by a bus? Because his mom was laughing. Why was his mom laughing? Because she was driving the bus. Why was she driving the bus? Because the boy fell off a swing. Why did he fall off a swing? Because he didn't have any arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because his diabetic monkey had the flu. Why did his diabetic monkey have the flu? Because the boy was crying.

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A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs at night? An experimental animal mutilated then exposed to radiation.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long face?'. The horse does not answer as it cannot speak or even understand english. It was later destroyed by the government.

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Why was Johnny so mad at his father? Because his father had a constant drinking problem and was very abusive.

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Where did Ben go after being hit by a high speed train? Underneath the train's wheels.

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What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

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If Apple made a house, would it have Windows?

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

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Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

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why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

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What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

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are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

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whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him to leave.

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What do you call a Muslim on the moon? An astronaut

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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