This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena and his Grandfather's lucky medallion and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Why did two rhinos engage in vigorous sex? They were horny.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Jews

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a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why didn't the chicken cross the road?!

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Women's Rights

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Roses are red violets are blue shes for me not for u if by chance u talk my place ill grab my fist and smah your face

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Q: The red house is to the left and the blue house is to the right. Where is the white house? A: 3 blocks down from the red house

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An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

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Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

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chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

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Why cant Hellen Keller read? Because shes dead!!!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Fetus Blood. Due to the low concentration of iron, it gives it an aroma of paint.

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an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

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How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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