Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

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A blond walks into a hair dresser's wearing a pair of headphones. The hair dresser tells the blond to take the headphones off so she can cut the blond's hair. The blond says that if they take off the headphones, then they'll die. The hair dresser works around the headphones, but finally needs to cut underneath the headphones. The hair dresser forces the blond to take the headphones off and nothing happened.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

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What do you call a horny horse? A unicorn.

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why does her hair shine so nicely? she uses good shampoo.

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

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what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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What did the orphan do on Mother's Day? He went to the cemetery

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James got up from the couch, forgetting what he got up for he asked his girlfriend, Mary: "What did I get up for again?" Mary replied "To get your medicine for your amnesia."

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have you seen Stevie wonders car? No Neither has he

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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What's worse than waking up next to an ugly girl? Waking up, sealed in a coffin which is floating on a raft traversing through shark-infested waters. Oh, and the raft is on fire.

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone...

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whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

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What do you call a black man sitting on a porch? Relaxed.

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What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

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Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

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What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

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Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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what is the different between a prostitute and your wife one is on contract and the other pay as you go

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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