your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red Violets are blue Horses that lose Are made into glue

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

thumb_up thumb_down -10

scraggle is in you pillow case

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

thumb_up thumb_down -10

No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red Violets are blue Carnations are cheap and they will not get you a blow job.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the woman say to the man before she had sex with him? "May I have sex with you, please?"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between sand and menstral blood? I can't gargle sand

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops