Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

Why did the mokey board the westbound train? I said gray umbrella noodle head!

whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

A woman stopped making sandwiches.

When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

what would george washington do if he was alive today? he would scream and scratch his coffiin

What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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