Why did the city disappear? Someone nuked it

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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Your momma is so fat that she is a plus size model and gets paid very well for modeling. Good for her.

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Q. How many blonds do you know? A. I don't know any blonds, but are you perhaps talking about blondes? Because if so, I still don't know any.

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Yo momma is so poor when she went to the bank the teller was like " you have no money."

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http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=eOr5o3kd5fIcpM:&imgrefurl=http://imgfave.com/search/be%2520stupid&docid=_B1z3__jBeF0wM&imgurl=http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1vrh3OhfK1r158a9o1_500.jpg&w=485&h=650&ei=Jo3HT-anK4To9ASrrp2KDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=104&vpy=105&dur=1249&hovh=260&hovw=194&tx=86&ty=138&sig=104463583013410208018&page=3&tbnh=162&tbnw=121&start=23&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:10,s:23,i:149

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If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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What do Australians and New Zealanders have against pods anyway?

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What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

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roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

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What's the difference between a bag full of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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What's big and green and would probably kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table.

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Why did Muhammad pray to Jesus? Because he has low self esteem and didn't believe in himself.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

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Q - What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a trampoline? A - I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.

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My teacher told me to so a report on women rights.....I turned in a blank sheet! ^.^

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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