How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

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A man walks into a doctors office He has AIDS

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The stone said to tree I wanna be car the tree replied you cant be a car. Forever a stone

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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Is this the Krusty Crab? Yes.

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I like my coffee like i like my women ... With big titys

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1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names

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Why didn't the boomerang return? It hit a baby

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What did the statue say to the other statue? stat-you?

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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If Alex Maitland reads this he is gay

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why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like pussy Because it feels really good when I stick my penis inside her vaginal opening

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Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

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Why did the nervous man jump out of a plane? He was sky diving.

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Why couldn't Sally celebrate hollaween? Because she's not allowed to take candy from strangers. Also Sally died a week ago in a car crash.

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

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What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

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what did the left foot say to the right foot? Nothing, feet don't talk

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Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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