There was a blond girl and a brunette girl. The brunette had a pink shirt that had " Abercrombie & Fitch" on it. The blond looks at the brunette and asks, where did you get your shirt?

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A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

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When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

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What time is it? 2:47 PM.

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Why did the world end? Because of Jim Layhey's whispering winds of shit.

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Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

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Whats less comfortable than a metal bench? The trunk of a car when you're being abducted.

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How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

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A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

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What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

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An old asian woman is driving down the freeway a drunk driver merges into her lane. Everyone is ok because she keeps a safe distance behind.

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a duck wanted grapes. he didnt get any

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Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

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Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

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3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? People that make dead baby jokes.

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why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

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Who moved faster? The snail or the blind man? The blind man until he ran into the road and got hit by a bus.

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

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Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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