hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

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Why does Snoop Dogg have an umberella? For shielding himself from the rain.

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Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

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So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

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Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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What did John name his dog? Doggy

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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What do you call it when you see a black man break his arm? There isn't really any name but I suggest he seeks medical attention.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

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what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Girl Scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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