What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

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Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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How did the black man survive the Train crash? He didnt, he died liked everyone else

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Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

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Felix? The Lucky cat? That is the only thing that comes to mind, I am dead tired, but I really don't mind staying up until I cant anymore physically, as for mentally I am getting pretty bad as for company.

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Why did the guy stay up all night on the internet? because hes a fat ugly bastard with no life

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what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

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Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

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A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

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Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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A man walks into a pizza place and orders a pizza. When he got the pizza, he saw it had pepporonis on it. He liked that, so he ate the pizza.

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

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My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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Why did the teacher's cat die? It had cat herpes and feline immunodeficiency virus

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what looks like a banana? a penis

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like if your cool

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Q: Why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: What to year old WOULDN'T?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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