If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

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what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

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What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

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When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

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How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

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What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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Charlie Sheen

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How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

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I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

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why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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A dancer walks into a barre

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"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

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Whats worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops