So a baby seal walks into a club.

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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

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Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

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A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

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your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

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What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

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Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

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2 doctors are talking to each other: -Dead? -Dead.

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A blind man who spoke English and a deaf man who used sign language went to a bar together. Although they didn't communicate they had a wonderful time.

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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Whats worse than driving a Ford Taurus? Driving two Ford Taurus'

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

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se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

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What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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