My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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Q: what do you call a much green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

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A bar walks into Chuck Norris.

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What do you call a black man in church? Religious

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dylan wishes he could come up with funny jokes. but that is impossible for a man trying to bat with a .5inch ****

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When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

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A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

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What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

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Why did the teenager take a shower? Because she was brutally raped by a serial rapist and felt dirty. Unfortunately for her, she was unaware that she was washing off the prints from her body and the rapist was never found

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Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

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Yo dawg, I heard you like cars. Thats cool, whats your favorite one?

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They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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Do you know what really hurts my feelings? Nerve damage.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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What human can fly without holding any thing (exept cloths i dont like inapropeate jokes i dont know it a very intresting quesiton

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Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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