Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

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What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

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Why was billy sad? He was being brutally hacked to peices behind his garage

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A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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- Hi, my name is Sarah Lennon. - Wow! Are you related to Sarah Palin?!

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Why was the Irish Cop happy to see the Mexican family killed in a accident? Because the Lopez family were a family known for generosity and selflessness. It came as no surprise to anyone who knew Steven Lopez and his beloved family that they were all organ donors and not only that but Shelly Lopez, Steven's oldest daughter had blood type O negative (the universal donor). Officer McO'Brianiganly's wife is dying in the hospital in need of a kidney transplant, doctors have given her just weeks to live. Now, thanks to unfortunate events for la familia Lopez., Officer McO'Brianiganly and his wife can live a long happy life together, just as they always imagined.

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roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

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What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

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so a man walks into a bar..... and says ouch.

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Yo mama so dirty when she takes baths there are rings.

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why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

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Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There Not Sally Why was the boy sad? Because he dropped his ice cream cone Why'd he drop his ice cream cone? Because he got ran over by a bus Why'd he get run over by a bus? BECAUSE SALLY WAS DRIVING

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what do you get when you have an albino black man, a lesbian middle eastern siamese twin of the female gender, a polygamist indian and a jewish native american? A very cultured and diversified posse of hostages. Take your pick.

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I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

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once you go Persian, there is no other alternative

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A man went skydiving and tragically died.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a mustang? I don't have a mustang in my garage..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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