Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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What do call a spoon that doesn't work? Broken.

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Why did the chicken cross the road...

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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My cat just died.

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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Yo mamas so dirty she has to take showers regularly so the stench of her pungent body odor is at a minimum.

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What do you get when someone tells you an anti joke? An anti joke.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stoplight turned green

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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so a black,Hispanic,chines,white and Asian man walk into a bar and they sat down had a couple drinks and had a good conversation and left as happy as could be

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Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

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In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he was late for his uncle's funeral, which was taking place in the church across from his apartment.

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When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops