How did little jimmy survive the plane crash? He ate all the survivors, then when the helicopter arrived he ate them too and took the helicopter.

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha

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How can you tell your not italian? You aint no Guito!

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why did the girl fall of her bike She had no arms

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What's green and black? Grass with wheels.

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What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

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Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

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what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

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what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

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why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

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Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted better pay.

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Do you want to hear a joke, Women's rights

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a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

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What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

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Why was the black man carrying the television away from the store? He bought it

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Why was Jimi's mom sad? Because Jimi suddenly fell to the floor clenching his neck while saying "I'm Dying!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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