What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

quinn knows four other quinns but he ruined my life so he tells me to stop because im ruining this website but i disagree and now he is trying to tell me a joke and im not listening he is still trying but i don't care because i hate him,

If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

Knock Knock. Who`s there? Hadooouuuuuuu! Hadou who? KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! PERFECT!!! Perfect Bonus: 38493483948394839483984 Skill 0000000 Your life 0 Bonus 9001

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, cause they are walls.

EVERYBODY has a penis!!! Everybody!!!!

What is a quicker way to transfer money than electronic banking? Keeping it on one's person and getting mugged for it, or else handing it over in a mutual deal.

A baby seal walks into a club.

A man goes to the potty.

Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

I guess we will have to see, if I where to one day use my ways of thinking with the intention to become the most corrupt politician of them all, do you think I would succeed?

How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

Why were you in an igloo? I don't know, why were you?

When does 1+1=3? When the condom fails.

Why to lawyers wear neckties? It's part of the uniform.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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