You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

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-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

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Why was Jimmy upset? He wasn't.

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Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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What happen to the guy who stole the TV. He runs away as he fears the person that stoled his/her TV reports him/her to the police.

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How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

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What's the mosy hardest game in the world? The Impossible Game.

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Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

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So a seal walks into a club.

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So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

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What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

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Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

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Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

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what is green and has weels? grass i was kidding about the weels.

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How many Dead Babies does it take fill a phone booth? There is an obvious epidemic going around causing millions of babies to die. This is no laughing matter and the mothers of these babies are probably going through therapy to get over their lost.

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Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

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Have you heard about the awesome farmer? He was outstanding in his field. -ymda

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What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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Why was the girl distressed by the photo of her boyfriend's mutilated corpse? Because it was out of focus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops