What did the elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. -Albert Einstein... LOL JOKES my name is PJ.

What is red and cry's? A baby chewing on a razor blade

A woman with big boobs walks into a bar and gets raped

what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Astyanax mexicanus, a subspecies of Mexican tetra that lives in a subterranean habitat and as such has structurally degenerate eyes that have atrophied over the course of evolution.

Q: How did the black man get the white man's money? A: He walked up, politely asked if he could borrow some money, and told him he would pay him back tomorrow.

What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

Roses are red Violets are blue ... Uhhhh I don't think anyone knows the rest of this!!!!!!

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a jam sandwich

What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Finding an apple in your worm !!! ... Wait, what ?

What looks like a smiley face no serously what I want to know

You know what's a real drag? A club foot

Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

What do you call a guy that just shit himself? Me

old spice body spay is so powerfull it can block BO for 16 hours. its so powerfull it can turn of the sun, but then it gets to cold, so it makes another sun........DOUBLE SUN POWWWWWEEEERRRRRRR!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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