There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

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Why was girl happy on the day she found out she wasn't pregnant? -It was her birthday.

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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Why? Because.

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What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

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whats sad about 4 black guy drivein off a cliff in a cadalic a wast of good cadalic

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A white, black, and Hispanic man walk into a bar at 2:00 in the morning. Unfortunately the bar closed at midnight, so they were charged with breaking and entering, and were sentenced to 2 years in prison.

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Why did Sally sell seashells by the seashore? Because she has no arms and couldn't find a job.

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What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

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Knock knock, ... Little Timmy bursts into tears, Because his parents don't love him.

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what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

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A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

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what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

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1d

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Why did the dog cross the road? Because he saw another dog

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And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

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Correct grammar and proper use of capitals on the internet. Oh yeah, and a horse walked into a bar. It didn't think much of it.

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Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

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Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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