Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

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what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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Q: Do you know what's the no.1 cause of pedophellia? A: Sexy kids

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This website is dumb Your mom is going to kill you

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Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

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*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

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How do you help a black person find a job ? Tell them places that are hiring.

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i'm hard

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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There was a curtain who sneezed and then asked you for a tissue. He was in a room with two chairs a coffee table and a 37 year old bookcase, why did he sneeze???? Because he had a cold!!????

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Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

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Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

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Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

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Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

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A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

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Did you know there was a black man in my family tree? He married my aunt.

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why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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