Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Your mama is so fat, we are all seriously concerned about her health.

Q: Why did your mom cross the street? A: Because she was so ugly that she fell off both sides of the bed

Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

What were the muslims doing on the plane? Probably going somewhere that was too far to walk or drive.... just like everyone else on the plane.

Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw some pandas spooning.

What is the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything? 43 - 1 = ?

Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn't quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police. Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family's murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family's killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer's whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was. As he arrived at the killers' home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in. After fighting through many of the dealers' body-gaurds, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Froghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be.. As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Froghorn's life didn't, and wouldn't, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more. As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him "You're finally home Ralph, you're finally home."

y r black people noses so big??? A= god had to hold tem somehere to spray paint them

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, nobody could fit inside a pineapple, nor could a pineapple survive in the sea

Why did the baby stop crying? I shot it with a 9mm pistol and put it in the microwave because it cried while I was watching Sienfeld.

Why did the war end? Because one country surrendered. They were getting beat pretty bad, it seemed like the only viable option.

Whats worse then any minority? The fact they still exist.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens don't have the thinking skills to reason.

Why did the boy chuck a fridge at the other boy? Because he broke his toy train.

roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

How do you make a clown happy then sad? You give him pot then shoot him in the foot

Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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