A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

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ok last night i found a pic of romney saying "if i win the election 8 million people will have no job" then Obama says hey romney now that i won the election it would be 8 million and one stupid.

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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Knock knock. Come right on in.

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why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

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How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

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What did the homeless man's sign say? It didn't say anything. You had to read it.

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Why is SkrillEX bad at fishing? S EX

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Why is this website called anti joke.com? Because it has anti jokes.

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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What happens if a black person meets a white person? They shake hands

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Finding out that your girlfriend is really a drag queen and that that is why you have never had sex. -Harrison

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a motorcycle nothing, I dont have either

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what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

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Roses are red Violets are blue I don't know how to rhyme Refrigerator ------------

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FOX News: Fair and balanced

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust

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What is dark in the darkness even if you shine a torchlight on it? A blackman

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What dod the boy with no arms get or christmas? Nothing he can't open them!

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Why is Coldplay really big in Japan? They're tall guys.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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