How do you confuse a blond? Nordic mytholigi. That is, if shes american

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

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what happens if you fart to hard? A.you shit yourself

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

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Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

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what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

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95556

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whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

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Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

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Why did the little boy cry and run home from the store? Because the store was out of pickles.

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what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

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A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

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How could you tell Adam and Eve wasn't black? ANSWER--YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TAKE A RIB FROM A BLACK MAN. ISSAIAH FROM OHIO YOLO:]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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