What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

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What do call a spoon that doesn't work? Broken.

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A gay guy asks a boy out and a girl The girl said no but the guy said yes And the two gay guys went to dinner And made out

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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My cat just died.

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How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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Q: What's a crutch's favorite song? A: Lean on me

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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Why did the chicken cross the road...

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So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

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why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

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What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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a black man walks out of popeyes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops