How do you shock thomas eddison? Attatch his kite to his balls.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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why did victor sell half of club getaway because he wants a partner why did david buy the half because victors dying

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A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

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What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

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Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

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Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

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Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

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A panda walks into a bar, orders some bamboo shoots, and bamboo leaves, and eats them

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A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

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I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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