Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour.

a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

Why couldn't the little boy see? His eyes were closed.

What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

Whats worse then a worm in your apple This joke

Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

What's black and sits at the top of the stair case? Stephen hawking in a house fire.......

How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

kennah campion when she talks

three white men are running after a black man,, the black man is winning the race

What did Superman say to Batman when they first met? Nothing. They are not real.

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

u know whats a crime? rape

how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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