- Anti Joke

Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

whats better than nailing a baby to a wall? Ripping it off the wall.

Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

If Tigger was a black panther Christopher Robin would have named him Nigger.

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

How do you paint a wall red? Throw a baby at it.

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

what did Stan say to Dave? nothing, Dave died 500 years before Stan was born, thus he said nothing.

What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.