why did the kid drop his toy? a dog was ripping out his throat

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what goes in hard and comes out soft? bubblegum, what were you thinking?

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yo momma is so ugly, she attempted to get plastic surgery and then died from the amount of blood loss she got when the surgeons realized her head was filled with tumors and they failed to extract them.

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Knock knock... Home invasion

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What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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Some Minions have one eye, others have two. And nobody seems to care.

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When life gives you lemons......you should be really scared because life shouldnt be giving you anything....espically lemons so if life offers you lemons you better run

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Why did the black man break up with his white girlfriend? Because he didn't love her anymore.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

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what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

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Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

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What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

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why did the monkey fall out of a tree?? a snail threw a refridgerator at him

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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I'm hungry.

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There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

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What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

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Why did the Mexican jump of the roof? Because he had a serious meth addiction that was destroying his family and he could not live with the awful things he did to get his fix.

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What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

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A man walks into a bar, he purchases a drink from the barman proceeds to finish the drink and then leaves.

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What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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