yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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A black man walks into a white man on the street. The white man viciously beats the black man.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

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A Jew with a boner runs into a wall, what hits first? His nose

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what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

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Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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A young boy is crying in the park, when priest walks up to him -What's the matter son? -My parents died in a horrible car accident 2 weeks ago and now i'm held in an abusive household.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

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why did the plant eat a banana? it was hungry

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This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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