What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

Where di mary go during the bombing? Everywhere.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

Tunechi

How can a black person and a white person be friends? The civil right's movement.

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

my wifes star sign is cancer, kinda ironic how she died really..... she got eaten by a giant crab.

why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

What happen to the guy who stole the TV. He runs away as he fears the person that stoled his/her TV reports him/her to the police.

your dads so fat, he makes your mom look skinny.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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