A blond walks into a hair dresser's wearing a pair of headphones. The hair dresser tells the blond to take the headphones off so she can cut the blond's hair. The blond says that if they take off the headphones, then they'll die. The hair dresser works around the headphones, but finally needs to cut underneath the headphones. The hair dresser forces the blond to take the headphones off and nothing happened.

Phoebe: Joey, it's a birthday party. Joey: Yeah, but for a one year old. What's the point? The other day, she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow. And the cow says...."Elmoooo!" Joey: *starts to laugh* Yeah...that's a funny cup.

Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

why do you park in the driveway and drive on the park way

how do you kill a black guy ? AIDS

What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

a man makes a bad joke

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van.

What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

yo momma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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