Knock Knock, Who's there? Nobody..

How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

Why shouldn't you go to California? Because there are sharks there, obviously.

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

What did the commentor say when he saw the "waht's worse than finding a worm in your apple...the holocaust." joke? I am offended to your cruel referance to worms.

What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

Why is the black guy jobless? He's 3 years old.

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon and Micheal Jackson molests little boys.

Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car. He tells the car where to go!

one day a bear was eating for winter he ate about half what he had to and said "Im tired ill take a nap and eat the rest later. one month later he died of starvation

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

I heard a scary rumor that when you plzy a windows istaller cd backwards, it plays a secret message, but what's even scarier, is that when you play it forwards, it installs windows.

There were three soap salesmen in a bar. They were comparing how good they were at selling their wares. "I'm so good that I sell 60% of my soap bars each day," says the first salesman, bragging. The second one wasn't to be outdone. "I'm so good that I sell 80% of my soap bars," he declared. The last salesmen, who, up to the moment had been relatively quiet, suddenly said in a calm and collected manner, "Oh that's nothing. I'm so good that I sell all of my soap bars each day."

What has a skinny head and specky? Josh Moran.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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