- Anti Joke

Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

Why did two rhinos engage in vigorous sex? They were horny.

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

i wonder who made this website? a human

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

God made Coke God made Pepsi God made me, Oh so sexy

A chicken walks into a bar and orders a beer. Just kidding chickens cant talk and animal control was called

What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

A man with a broken arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I broke my arm, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

9/11 my birthday

How do you fit a giraffe into a refrigerator? You cut it into pieces.

how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians