Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

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Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

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Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

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Whats worse than a creep? ..... Paul sweeney!

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Why did the girl fall of her bike? Because she got hit by a fridge!

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What's Black, white, green, and red? To bloody zebras fighting over a pickle

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A: I accidentally shot my sister with a rifle! B: you don't have a sister? A: exactly

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall again? Because somebody put her back on. Why wasn't she able to hug her dad? Because she has no dad.

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Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

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While getting Sherrie's Crabcakes I was arrested by Missy Hepp highway patrol.

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What do you call an African American sitting on a park bench? Elephant-man (I forgot to mention, he has a giant elephant trunk)

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What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

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Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

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Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

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I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

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Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

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Whats black and white and musty? A nuns pussy because it never gets used.

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Yo mama so dumb she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl! I'm sorry,that was just really rude of me. I've been talking to my therapist and I think this insolent behavior came from my dad. I always wanted his approval but he always liked my brother more and blah blah yak yak.....

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Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He goes to the restroom and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. He goes to the restroom again and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. Guess what happens next? A. He goes to the restroom to urinate B. He buys another drink C. He flirts with a very attractive lady D. Goes home and masturbates

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A boy is diagnosed with terminal cancer. His family prays for him and he still dies.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chicken is a funny word, and the road is a plot device.

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops