Your playing NBA 2k12 and some one steals the man your covering and you scream "THAT'S MY MAN!" what sounds wrong in this situation?

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When Harry met Sally, she slapped him twice without reason, walked away and kept on with her day.

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How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

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A Chinese, American, and German were all on the a boat sinking off the Border of the U.S. So the American called the U.S Coast Guard and they were rescued and taken to a nearby hospital. Two of the three members are still alive today and haunted by the memory of that day.

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my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

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You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

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What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

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What page are you on The gay page.

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There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Does it feel hot in here?". The other muffin says back, "Holy crap! It's a talking muffin!".

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

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A blind man walks into a bar. I mean a fence.

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A cyclist looses control in a race. How does he stop? Run into the spectators on the side of the road.

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Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

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A bartender walks into a bar, and starts his shift.

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Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

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How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

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What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled I've cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

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How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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