*puts thumbs up on own anti-joke. Nobody needs to know....

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

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knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

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Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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69...you know how awkward this is now...

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How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

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Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

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Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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Burp

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

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These jokes don't have punchlines.

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A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

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Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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What do you call someone with no arms, one leg,and an eye patch? names

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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