Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

A monk went to a bar. He soon came out because he realized he didn't have cash because he left his wallet in his other robe.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

Roses are red Violets are blue Today is Valentines Day I am depressed

Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

Potassium? K.

What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

Roses are red, and many other colors too.

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

What is the difference between Sarah Jessica Parker and a horse? Sarah Jessica Parker is a human being who is also a very skilled actress A horse is a animal which is usualy kept in a barn

What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? What's the WNBA?

Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

At first I was at the party and I was like YOLO!! But then I got pregnant and was like yolo....

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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