Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

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A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

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A blonde is rowing a boat in a cornfield. While driving by, another blonde notices and pulls over and steps out of her car. She looks out and yells "You know, it's blondes like you that are giving us a bad name. If you weren't so far out, I would swim out there and beat the shit outta you!"

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I'm tired.

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

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A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

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Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

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Q: What's small, round, and looks like a marble? A: A marble.

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke-'er-face

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You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

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Knock knock. Who's there? the police.

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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woman's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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