Hi im a joke i eat turtles

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

It was a boys birthday, his mom died of cancer, his dad of aids, and all of his siblings were put in a gas chamber. Happy Birthday

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops