Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

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3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. Jewish people celebrate Hanukkah

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What do you call a man with a horse? A man

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A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

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What did the snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?

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What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...Kaboom!

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Once a upon a time there was a girl named Cinderella. She rubbed a magic lamp and a genie appeared. Then a guy named Larry Harry walks into a laundry mat. 7 days later she died.

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The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

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Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

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What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How long was the awkward silence it took to make Justin Bieber? Really long.

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Gary: Stick your tongue out and say "I live in a pirate ship" Bruce: *sticks tongue out* "I lib inna pile of shiiit."

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Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

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Why was the dentist sent to jail? Because he committed a crime.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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What did the black kid say to the white kid My parents are slaves

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Why does sammy have a cut on her arm? becuase her mom went to go stab her dad and missed

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whats cold, blue and hard? a frozen blueberry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops