scraggle is in you pillow case

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What's the difference between sand and menstral blood? I can't gargle sand

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Roses are red Violets are blue Carnations are cheap and they will not get you a blow job.

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why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got hit y a car

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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What did the woman say to the man before she had sex with him? "May I have sex with you, please?"

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Max Head fingered himself, HAH

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

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I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

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Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Horses that lose Are made into glue

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Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

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How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

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I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops