Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

Doesn't matter, had sex. Except for the STD's I possibly contracted.

What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

What's worse than tripping over your shoelace? Watching your mother get her tits cut off with a chainsaw then getting ripped apart and eaten alive by cannibals

Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

Why couldn't Sally celebrate hollaween? Because she's not allowed to take candy from strangers. Also Sally died a week ago in a car crash.

what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

What did the horse say to the man? The man woke up from his dream so he didn't know either

Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

A man walked into a pole barn oh wait I meant a pole bar so it actually hurt.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? The Holacoast

what do u tell a woman who has two black eyes? nothing, somebody already told her twice.

What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

What did the platypus do whenever he walked into the bar? Nothing. It's a platypus, they don't do much.

Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

Paper or plastic? Yes...

A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being hit by a plane.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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