Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

what did the deaf guy say when the poor man asked how life was? the deaf guy didn't respond considering the fact that he was deaf and would never interact with a poor man.

Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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