A guy walks into a bar and laughs. Later, a green, homosexual dinosaur dentist escorts him out to play a houdini banjo.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What does the ice cream man say to the kids? Hey kids want some ice cream?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

You might be a redneck if you hate your father and you live in a trailer

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Hey, did you hear about the guy who got his left arm and left leg cut off? Yeah, it was pretty brutal. His right arm and right leg got cut off, too.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why couldn't Jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock-Knock Who's there? The The Who? The Beatles!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

thumb_up thumb_down -13

shirt and blue, i call this one snow white, to score and seven years a jo, six samurai kageki, coral, 50 piece, specific frame, whats with that one, amy, hoption, smell my butt, smell my balls, smell my fart, smell my poop, urgay, pringles,

thumb_up thumb_down -13

You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Mr. Moseley choose to not buy crest toothpaste this month? Because your daughter got an abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats black and white and red all over? A dead zebra

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops