What do retards eat for lunch? Grilled Cheese

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

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Yo Mama's so fat that she is at risk for diabetes

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What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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How did the fat guy survive the plane crash? Because he still in the food court at the airport.

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

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Mila Kunis is fugly. Said no one ever.

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A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was eaten alive!!!

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what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

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How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

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Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

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What do you call a black person doing labor for other people? A good friend.

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What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

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if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

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Jimmy Saville

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Why did the girl break her leg? Because I pushed down the staircase.

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Why was the woman so hot? she was on fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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