Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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The kid was riding a honda xr70r. He got hit by a non moving object and died.

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What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

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why did the white man walk into the bar? He was thirsty

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Why did the hooker cross the road? Because was a prostitute

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

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Why was Blue looking for her clue. She was drugged by a stranger and ended up inside of Mailbox.

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How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

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Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

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What would happen if hitler and winston Churchill was in a bar? The police will be called to take them away as there just laying there dead

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Q. want to hear the biggest lie in the world ? A. sure A.I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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If you driving a jetski and the wheeles fall off how many screws does it take to fix the dog house? BLUE PAINT

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What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

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That's not mine! it's bigger and blacker! ...where have i heard this before?

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

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The global news

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Nope.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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