There's a donut on a cruise ship and he goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain goes "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and says "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain replies "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain says "NO!" and throws him over board Theres a couple on the cruise ship and the man was going to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and propose. So he was showing his bestfriend (who was also on the cruise ship) the ring. But was he pulled it out the wind picked up and the ring fell over board. So the man was forced to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and couldn't propose. So they go to dinner and the both get crab. And when they open up the crab and guess what's in the crab?! Not the ring the donut!!!

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A man goes to his doctor and asks: ""What is wrong with me doc? One moment I think I am a teepee, the next moment I a, a wigwam." To which the doctor responds: "I have told you several times sir; you have stage IV pancreatic cancer."

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What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Bob: "Did you eat my sandwich?" Alex: "I am your sandwich."

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You know what's natural? Bears.

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

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Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

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Pigachu is a Porkemon.

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Why did the boy go to his room? Because his father told him to.

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What happens when Chuck Norris and Mr. T get into a car accident? They trade insurance information.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? a guy who copies antijokes on ant joke.com

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People...

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How did the little boy fall over? He was tripped up by his alcoholic father.

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Why did the white girl become a lesbian? Because she was raped and had no more trust in the male gender.

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Whats the difference between a sandwhich and a dead baby? People eat sandwhiches.

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Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

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A: I accidentally shot my sister with a rifle! B: you don't have a sister? A: exactly

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If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

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Why did Gavin kill Harley. Because his voices told him to.

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Shark week? More like owl week. Hoo!

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your mama's so fat... that's it

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What's white, black, red, and flies? An airplane pilot with a battleaxe driven into his head

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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