Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

Knock,Knock Who's there? The Police, Your under arrest for urinating on a toliet.

a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

Dude man, I'm high...

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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