What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

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A man walks into a bar, and he died.

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Potassium? K.

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What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

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Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him to leave.

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No antijoke here.

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Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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Whats worse than driving a Ford Taurus? Driving two Ford Taurus'

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia So do I

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple, not fucking blue.

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Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

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womens rights.

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I like it it the butt -Tyler James Nehring call me 863-670-1547

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

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What do you call a skeleton in a closet? The hide-and-seek champion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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