Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

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What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

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Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

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whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

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Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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roses are red violets are blue maskrosor are gula

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Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

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My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

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How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

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A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

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How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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