A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

what are you talking about. Nets are terrible. Lakers are going to be the best.

Knock Knock! F*ck off

knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

What happened to the orphan who ate a sandwitch? She got hit by a whale!

can you touch your toes? no

Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

What's so funny about Mexicans? Nothing. They're all humans too.

Why did the blonde fall off the cliff? She was blind and deaf so she never knew where to go, and her parents kicked her out for her problems. It is a sad situation that noone wants to go through

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "I just found out I have AIDS"

Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

A Gamer walks into the tavern, the bartender says to him, "just dont act like you control the place!"

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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