How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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Why did Mexico enter the war? Because they were bombed.

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yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

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Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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whats worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

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Have you heard about the awesome farmer? He was outstanding in his field. -ymda

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knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

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Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops