What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Meanwhile in the basement...an elderly man, who lives a lone and whose children lead their own lives and dont have much time for him, lies on the ground unable to move after having falling down the stairs. He has been there for 2 days. He is frightened and confused, he hears someone knocking and his hopes perk up, he tries to call but due to lack of water his mouths is too dry to do so. He sobs in frustration. Knock Knock [Silence] The old man cries, aware of his fate.

Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

whats funnier then a joke on anit jokes pracitcally anything cause anti jokes repaeats and everyone has herd them

Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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Sammy bought 48 donuts. He ate 36. What was Sammy left with? Diabetes. Sammy was left with diabetes.

Why did the bird plummet to the earth? It was shot.

Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

like if your cool

A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

What's round, has two hands, and tells time? Some fat guy I know, with a watch.

Knock, Knock Who's there? The Johnson Family was then heard on the morning news for letting a murderer into their home before being brutally killed.

knock, , knock , who's there the gas man the gas man who ? the gas man who is gonna turn your gas off !

How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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