Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

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A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

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Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

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why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

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What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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I Have a Black Friend

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Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

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“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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