How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

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What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

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like most people my age. im 27

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

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Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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