- Anti Joke

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

Q.How do you scare an emo?? A.Run after them with plasters

Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

How do you turn a piece of meat into a vegetable Break her neck

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

Which way do 5 gay guys walk? Depends on where they're planning to go.

What did the Jewish man get for his birthday? Pork.

S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

Why did Lisa let go of the monkey bars? she was being molested

What do you call an orange fruit? An Orange.

why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

A redhead walks into a bar and goes to the restroom. She needed to pee.

What is blue and invisible? Invisible blue paint