- Anti Joke

Q.whats black and white and red all over A. half a zebra

Roses are red, Violets are blue, this is stupid, Violets are purple Violets are purple Oranges are orange Nothin' rhymes with orange wait.... DOORHINGE!!!!! -sincerely, That famous Orange on YouTube

The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

BTW ANders she is gone, read below, seriously! And your mother is ugly, but she is so kind to me, so ill be nice to her too... Seducing a LONE WIDOW ME 32 years she... 180 and always blushing around me? Thats gonna be hard... No seriously, I kissed her on the cheek the other day, she moaned... And she aint that old... looks like a old 40 year old. ANDERS! AAAANDEERS! CHATTERTON!!! Anyway, tell your mom, that way Ill just need to enter, kill you, and you know... make her feel like she is ... 77 again? Nah she is ahornbag so she must be younger, wont kiss her on those lips though ANDERSSSss because she smokes, the others? Sure, Ill take a pic of her squirting! From the guy that taught you how to make any woman squirt... YOu fucking asshole!

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

How does it change many dyslexics take to a lightbulb.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

Woman + Kitchen = sandwich

Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

What happens when you put a baby, a dog and a cat in the same bag They will all most likely suffocate if left in the bag too long

Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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