What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

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What do you call a man sitting at the bar drinking alone? An alcoholic.

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Q: Why did the black man die poor? A: Because he was financially irresponsible and wasted the millions left to him by his father fueling his alcohol addiction, slowly grinding away at his organs until he died of cirrhosis of the liver.

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What's more horrible than Twilight? Hitler.

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A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

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why didnt the whiteperson sit down at obama's election? because he had hemorrhoids

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

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What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

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What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

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A plane crashes on the border of the U.S. and Canada, where were the deceased buried? It turns out that there were passengers of several different nationalities on board, all of which were buried in their respective homelands.

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Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

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why is ur dad an alcoholic? he drinks a lot of alcohol

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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What is black, white and red all over? Something that pertains those characteristics

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How do you make 5 lbs of fat look good? Draw a smiley face on it.

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Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

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Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

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KEVIN CRUMMY SMELLS LIKE SARAHS (I)

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Knock Knock Who's there? John John who? John Williams.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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