I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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roses are red violets are blue grass is green

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What's black, white, and red all over? And interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

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how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

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Q:Why was the black guy carrying a gun A:He's a cop

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

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Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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What did one butthole say to the other butthole? I'm actually not sure. I wasn't there when he said it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops