What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

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Why does a squirel swim on his back? Because it was trying to keep his nuts clean

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

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If you give a man a fish, he'll eat it.

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Non-Anti-Joke.com!

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question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

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A man was walking through the woods when he comes across a little girl crying by a lake. "What is the matter little girl?" he asked. "My cat fell in the lake ... and it couldn't swim ... so my father jumped in as well and drowned too," she cried," Sad, the man sighed, pulled down his pants and said, "Well I guess today's just not your day,"

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Why did the Black man kill the White man? So he could end up in jail with the rest of his family.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

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Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

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How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

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why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Whats worst than the holocaust? What? 6million Jews.

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A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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what do you call a guy with no arm and legs laying by the door? Matt! what do you call a guy with no arms and legs floating on water Bob!

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Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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