A monk went to a bar. He soon came out because he realized he didn't have cash because he left his wallet in his other robe.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Wanna hear a dirty joke? ... A boy played in mud.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: You know what's worse than being a mother? A: Almost everything, because being a mother is not a bad thing, in fact, it's a wonderful thing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did little polly fall off her her roof? Because she saw a ice-cream van

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why would you kill a black man? Well, murderers have different motives, the most common of these are revenge or a psychological illness.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hey how is your wife and my kids

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

thumb_up thumb_down +8

When is the only time you see a Mexican and Black person driving together ? When they feel like it .

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops