What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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knock knock, who's there me me who he opens the door a kills yo

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How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

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A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

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A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

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Whats worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two busses.

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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You're in the middle of the ocean and you see a roller coaster. What color is the penny? Tree.

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have down syndrome, my favorite color is potato

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What is the difference between a group of magicians and a cheerleading squad? One has a cunning array of stunts.

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What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

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Why does Joel get so many numbers from girls? Because he asks for them nicely.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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Why do Mexicans always have heart burn? Because the food is spicy.

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Why was the man lying on the pavement? He was hit by a fridge

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A man did not like this site

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Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay boys house. Knock knock! whose there? The chicken!!

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

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How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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