A B C D E F G.... Gummy bears are chasing me 1 is red, 1 is blue 1 is tryin to steal my shoe now i'm running for my life cuase the red 1 has a knife

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between a clever trick and a computer programmer? A clever trick throws you for a loop, and a computer programmer throws you a for loop.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red, Violets are blue, In Soviet Russia, Poem writes you.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why didn't the magician pull a rabbit from a hat? Despite his choice of occupation, magic tricks are rarely appropriate in hostage situations.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

the economy.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red, HOLY SHIT THE GARDEN'S ON FIRE

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

thumb_up thumb_down +5

knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Joker: Why so serious Man: My mom and dad just got hit by a car, and you just stabbed my friend in the face with a pencil. Joker: Oh well im sorry to hear that.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops