Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

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So this squirrel is walking across the road when a HUGE truck comes and smashes him beneath the tire.

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What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

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What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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What do you call a black man driving a fire truck? A firefighter you racist.

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Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

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Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

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Q. How can you tell if a snake bites? A. It depends on if he walks to school or carries his lunch.

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

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what is black white and red all over? A black and white movie with the first violent color leave a comment if this joke is duped.

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What do you call a black man fishing. ... a fisherman racist.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

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How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...Kaboom!

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A black guy and a Puerto Rican are in a car. Who's driving? Most likely one of the two, because if they were not that would be illegal.

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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Knock Knock Who's There? Children Protective Services. Your kids are dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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