What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

What can bankrupt people buy? Free stuff.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

Why the african children was sad? - Because an octopus bite his arm

A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

That awkwad moment when a homeless man runs naked around a golf cource yelling hears the 19th hole bitches.

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

Whats from Hattersley? Someone who lives in Hattersley.

Sorry we dont serve time travlers here. A man walks into a bar.

What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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