How do you get a person to stop talking to you? Ask nicely to please be quiet and let me talk.

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? It got hit by a stone. Why did the second Koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by the first Koala. Why did the third Koala fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game. Why did the Kangaroo die? It was hit by three falling Koalas.

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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If John had 4 apples and gave 2 to Mary, what is the circumference of the sun?

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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What's worst than dropping your watch into the gutter? Waking up with a penis on your head.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can walk wherever the hell they want. Leave them alone.

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Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

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Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

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The way I see it, there are two types of people. Some are female and some a male.

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What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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What did the computer say to his girlfriend? I'm going to RAM you tonight.

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PICKLES

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What happens when Chuck Norris and Mr. T get into a car accident? They trade insurance information.

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Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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Yo mom is so stinky that when she gets in a room every one leaves the room

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A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. When they both begin to pee, the white man looks over at the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels slightly depressed over his closet homosexuality. Both men leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself asleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? No. Well, neither has he

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how do you find a ghost? shoot yourself.

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What is white and fluffy? A cotton ball.

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I milked the cow, but no gas came out.

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Right now I'm walking down a road shoot car rhendhhdgfgdyxchdhsggggggggggggggggggggggggg

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if i gave a rats ass, I'd worry about you.

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Think of a number 1-10 Now add 39 Divide that by 20 Subtract two Now close your eyes.. Dark isn't it?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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