Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

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What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

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Why did the guy stay up all night on the internet? because hes a fat ugly bastard with no life

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whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

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What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

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Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

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What's heavier: a kilogramme of steel or a kilogramme of feathers? A kilogramme of steel, because steel is heavier than feathers.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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Why did the teacher's cat die? It had cat herpes and feline immunodeficiency virus

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A smiling Frog talks with a lion O O U What do u eat for breakfast lion? V V T T Smiling frogs __(___ |____| O O -

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Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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josh sucks polish adams dick

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Hey, you are competitive, but let me have the last word here and you will like it. If you keep poking your nose constantly, the effect will actually overlap, making it stronger and stronger, by all means though, make sure you keep some nose working alright?

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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what do you call a dog with no legs. It dosent matter it wont come

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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