Please save our environment :) Dont use electricity. Use gas! Like Hitler.

What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

An irish man and a lebanese man jump off a cliff who wins? No one it wasnt a race

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed off his entire family.

why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

Doctor! I have no problems at all! So, uh why are you here? Isnt that freaking weird? Wow, that might be a problem! Puh! I have a problem then. Yeah, goodbye!

How do you starve a black man? You slowly emasculate him over 400 years through a system designed solely for the benefit of whites, and subsequently he is malnourished.

What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

Man: Hey girl for a minute there I thought I had died and gone to heaven, but now I realize that I am very much alive, and that heaven has been brought to me. Girl: No actually you were right the first time we are both dead right now.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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