How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

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How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

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What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

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An overweight man is at a gym. he is trying to lose weight because he feels uncomfortable with his size.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am colorblind because Iam a dog.

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Why would you kill a black man? Well, murderers have different motives, the most common of these are revenge or a psychological illness.

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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What do you call a person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk? A person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk.

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Kobe Bryant passing the ball

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you will like this because i am black.

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What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a brand new Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

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A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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A Jewish man, a christian man, and a buddist man walk in bar, They all have to much to drink and are arrested for driving under the influence while trying to get back home.

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Two peanuts were walking down the road. One was assaulted because they were walking in Detroit.

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why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops