knock knock who's there? banana well that's an odd name. banana then began to break down in tears because his parents were constant drug abusers and gave him that name while they were high

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

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Q:Whats evil ,not funny and on wheels A:The Holocost on wheels

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Why was the blonde walking funny? She had a ten foot long metal bar shoved up her butt, and it was very painful to walk.

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How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

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If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

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Q: What did the dog say to the owner when he took him to the vet? A: Nothing. It's a dog. It can't talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Man: Hey girl for a minute there I thought I had died and gone to heaven, but now I realize that I am very much alive, and that heaven has been brought to me. Girl: No actually you were right the first time we are both dead right now.

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

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What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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