How did the Jew survive the holocaust? He didn't, he died.

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

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How did the little boy die? A speeding moving truck took a sharp turn, the locks on the doors broke open and a huge office desk flew out and crushed the boy.

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Pain Olympics.

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stoplight turned green

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guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

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What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

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roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

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antonio has a penis head.lol

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what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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whos on the right track? lady gaga

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Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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