A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

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We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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Ok so there were 2 white dudes telling black jokes...so one of the white dudes tells a joke to the other... 1st dude: what's brown and tall? 2nd dude: a tree 1st dude: no that scary black man who looks like he wants to beat us up.

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among liedbtt is my Captcha code

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Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk. Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

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what is red, yellow, green, blue, purple, and violet? Blood i lied about the other colors...

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I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

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What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

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Why did sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by an 18 wheeler Knock knock Whos there not sally

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What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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I stabbed a person. No seriously, I just stabbed them. There's no punchline. Just Just Stab wounds.

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

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why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

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Bugsys back back back again with a brand new track cumming on megs back back back with a new boxing cap cap cap, stealing millions from banks having a wank coz hes a lanky cockney mong

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How did the polack burn his hands on the stove? He placed his hands on the hot stove top burners not realizing they were hot.

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Q: Why is daddy wrestling mommy? A: Well Jimmy, that is called sexual intercourse. That is how you were created, and many people of all ages engage in this activity every second.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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