Q: What did the dragon say to the other dragon A: Nothing they did'nt exicest.

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What did michael jackson say to the boys he touched? Nothing. Hes dead

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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Johnny: One day dad i will be tall like you! (Later that day johnny was found dead in a garbage bag)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

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Where would you be unlikely to find a polar bear? In a courtroom.

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What did the Wind say to the Window? (Insert Racist punchline here)

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Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A. One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a highly trained professional skilled in the art of litigation.

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Whats the difference in car and a bicycle? One has an engine and drivetrain designed to run on gas and the other is powered by your output of work

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Roses aren't blue Violets aren't red She was my ex wife But now she's just dead.

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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how do you stop a baby from crawling in circles??????? you nail its other hand to the floor

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Two guys walk into a bar the third guy ducks

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why is ur dad an alcoholic? he drinks a lot of alcohol

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What do you call a man in front of three trains that have explosives tied to them and that are making amazingly loud noises? An idiot who obviously can't identify danger and probably had a childhood injury that cause his life to be ruined forever most likely cause by an evil uncle.

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Why did the boy scratch his back? A:because it was itchy.

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what gets louder as it get smaller? a baby in a blender

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

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What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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