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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

a white man a black man and an asian man had a few drinks at a bar. they all died from alcohol poisoning

Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

What's sad about a truck passing behind a duck? A: Behind the Duck were the Ducklings.

Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

A sober Irish individual.

What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

What's worse than being arrested by a cop? Dying of AIDS.

Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

How do you find the population of Mexico? Send out a census

Yo momma so ugly that she is unpleasant to look at

Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

Micheal Jackson walks into a bar

Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Postman. But I wasn't expecting a parcel. Is it for 37? No, Sorry, its for 35.

What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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