Q: How do Hellen Keller's parents punish her? A: They give her a timeout

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Why was six afraid of seven? He wasn't. that joke is just a way to convince you that seven is a scary number.

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A princess kisses a frog to aquire a prince.. then gets arrested for beastiality.

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Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

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You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? ...

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What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

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Q: How could the black man afford to buy a TV? A: He had a well-paying job and a supporting family.

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Mamma why did the kids make fun of me today? I dont know.

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What did the mother say to her son? Nothing, she was dead.

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what did the sock say to the shoe? Get your tongue off me.

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parents' bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't -- he said nothing, and the incident troubled him for many years.

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

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Why did Suzie die? She ate too many fried twinkies.

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A knock knock B who's there A nobody

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A boy is diagnosed with terminal cancer. His family prays for him and he still dies.

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? What? I don't have a Corvette in my garage Wanna hear something gross? Sure. 1 at the bottom is still alive. Wanna hear something grosser? Yea. It's eating its way out

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Who smells like urine and his da is a registered sex offender with madeline mccann in his house? Aodhan hearty, May I also include he looks like a bug. Oh and don't forget the rot on his teeth, it is fucking disgusting. It really looks like he hasn't brushed his teeth in quite a substantial period of time, in my opinion, he is the only person who is actually comparible to sean.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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