What have you got there? Hitler's gas bill... Oh.. don't show him that, he'll be furious Whys that? He can't read.

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

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My brother is crazy... crazy like a fox! I caught him eating a Possum on the side of the road yesterday.

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

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What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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Why do black people make the best milkshakes? because they use the finest ingredients

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Yo mamas so tan she might get skin cancer

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An alien, a midget, and a Jew walk into a bar... I forget the rest but your mom's a whore

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What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

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roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

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Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

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What do you call a fat ginger kid? Whatever his name is.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

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What's big, black, and girls love to ride on? A horse

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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