Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

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whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

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Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

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What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

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How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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why was the little boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

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why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

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A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops