Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

a brick cheats on another brick the brick finds out and dose nothing because it is a brick

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the baseball coach say to his son? Nothing. He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How did the man kill the black fly? He called the KKK fly and had it lynch the black fly

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

school homewrok

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops