Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

A black man has just died on your porch. What do you do? Immediately call for medical assistance and perform CPR.

welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

Why did the dog die? He was old

What did the Jewish girl do when I asked for her number? Roll up her sleeve...

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

What did Jimmy do on his 8th birthday? Turn 8.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

Wanna hear a joke? (Yeah, sure) So do I, got any?

you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

Why was 6 afraid of seven? well if 7 8 9 then what happened to the rest?

Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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