How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

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Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. It was hanging on a clothes line he didn't see, the fact that he was dyslexic is irellevant.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

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whats the difference between a ladybug and a jew? there is none

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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whats the difference between an orange and a dead baby? one is a tasty treat and the other is an orange

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knock knock who's there? banana well that's an odd name. banana then began to break down in tears because his parents were constant drug abusers and gave him that name while they were high

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What did the doctor say to the lawyer? Nothing. They weren't even together. He was in the hospital saving people and the lawyer was in his office working on a case.

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whats worse than getting hit whit a baseball? getting hit by a train

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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A black man and a hispanic man are in a car. Who is driving? The guy who didn't call shotgun.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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What is the worst joke to tell a Orphan? Knock Knock Who's there Not your parents ( Man than slams door in little girls face)

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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What do you call a horny horse? A unicorn.

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What is worse then losing your remote? Falling off a cliff landing on a sharp rock and dying slowly.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication.

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What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops