Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

Como estan lo que sienta in el tarea de tomo caliente? A. Los sientos! ~ this is why nobody likes Spanish

Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

Yesterday, my friend said I should facebook him. So I slammed a book into his face.

What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

A black man, a chinese man, and a dog decide to have a race. Unfortunately, they are shot by a sniper on a roof while still in the planning stages.

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

What is purple, stupid, gay, and tells shitty jokes? I don't know. You think of something.

I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

your so fat. your fat!

Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

What's big and messy? A big mess

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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