A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

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What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

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Q.sam is 18 years old, why can't she get her licence? A.because Sam is a lost dog on the street

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How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

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Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The Pterodactyl species became extinct 65 million years ago, and thus if you saw one today, you would be immediately taken into a mental hospital.

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Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

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Why's it so bad to be black and Jewish? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

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(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

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How do you offend a black man? Call him a nigger.

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In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

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so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

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why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

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What's faster than a Mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

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Who row's? •Liam Findlay

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Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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