What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? Nothing, he doesn't have the ability to open a present.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after anal

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How can you treble the value of any Skoda car? Ensure its paintwork, upholstary, floor, lights, wipers, steering wheel, brake, horn, CD player, radio and clutch are clean and/or sound; fill its petrol tank, oil, brake and winscreen wiper fluid reserves; fit a roof rack; include a red triangle, a fire extinguisher, a blanket and a first aid kit in the sale; take out comprehensive insurance and pay a year's road tax and MOT before selling it.

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What was hitlers least favorite pokemon? Hitler didnt have a least favorite pokemon because hitler died long before the idea of pokemon was created.

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What's black and white and red all over. Nothing, that's a contradiction.

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A white man, hispanic man, and a black man walk into a bar together. They order cokes.

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Why did the Jewish man bend down to pick up a penny? Because he had dropped it and required the penny as part of his payment for his food.

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A woman walked out of the kitchen.

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What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

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Why did Teddy eat dirt? Because he was hungry.

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They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

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What's worse than biting into a worm in your apple? Being run over by a stampede of elephants

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

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Bugsys back back back again with a brand new track cumming on megs back back back with a new boxing cap cap cap, stealing millions from banks having a wank coz hes a lanky cockney mong

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Click here for free sandwich.

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops