Why did Jenny fall off her bike? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Jenny

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

*puts thumbs up on own anti-joke. Nobody needs to know....

Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

69...you know how awkward this is now...

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

Burp

Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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