Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

haiku's are funny. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

Killing your friend as a joke.

What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

Ian Watkins was excited to attend the opening of the children's ward at the hospital today. It went well and the day was a success.

In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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