Two pen state administrators walk into a butt

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Nobody, this is a metaphorical door..

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What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Certainly not Jimmy.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

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Hello

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

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I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet... ...then I made fun of him and laughed.

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whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red, HOLY SHIT THE GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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What did the dinosaur say to the caveman? Nothing. Dinosaurs were wiped off the earth due to a tragic, world wide extinction about 65 million years ago while small mammals which would eventually evolve into humans survived.

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*puts thumbs up on own anti-joke. Nobody needs to know....

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because KFC was hiring

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THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

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Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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