welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

Neither have I, nobody knew him.

Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries! -by Ross

What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

What looks like poo but is rainbow colored? Rainbow colored poo.

a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

Q:Why was the black guy carrying a gun A:He's a cop

Julian Ha.

Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

Knock knock who's there?... a stupid punchline because the door is imaginary and I am just wasting your time telling a knock knock joke

Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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