Before her maiden voyage, they told the Titanic she could become anything. So she became a submarine.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs waterskiing? Skip

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Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

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A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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did you hear the joke about the vagina ....... you'll never get it

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why wouldnt you come to the dark side? i spit in the cookies

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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knock knock... who's there? uninterrupted cow uninterrupted cow who?? exactly....

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-What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

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What's white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A refrigerator.

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What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

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chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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Why did the man have a heart attack? Because he suffered from high cholesterol and cardiovascular disease.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with my brother anymore? Because he's dead.

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A black man walks into a white man on the street. The white man viciously beats the black man.

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A baby seal walks into a club. He immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

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You are as dumb as a dumb looking person.

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who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

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Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

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Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops