Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

"Roll back into the kitchen and imagine me a sandwich!" yelled the abusive husband to his paraplegic wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was little Timmy mauled by a bear? He poked it with a pointy stick.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

thumb_up thumb_down

A fat guy!

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was everyone afraid of Nick Morton? Because he had AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the girl distressed by the photo of her boyfriend's mutilated corpse? Because it was out of focus.

thumb_up thumb_down

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like. The man says,"I'm feeling light today so I'll just have some H2O." The man's friend says,"I'm feeling the same. I'll have some H2O, too." The second man died.

thumb_up thumb_down

what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down

An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

thumb_up thumb_down

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down

Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, I do not stand for them.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

thumb_up thumb_down

Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

thumb_up thumb_down

www.hurr-durr.com

thumb_up thumb_down

Things i like to do when im bored; chase after ostriches take major dumps masturbate give myself major erections EJ

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being black

thumb_up thumb_down

An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

thumb_up thumb_down

My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops