A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

Yesterday, my friend said I should facebook him. So I slammed a book into his face.

Hey man how was the trip to Hiroshima? Great it blew my mind!! And how was Nagasaki ? It was the bomb!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

Why does a squirel swim on his back? Because it was trying to keep his nuts clean

the bible

"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

If you give a man a fish, he'll eat it.

whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

A man was walking through the woods when he comes across a little girl crying by a lake. "What is the matter little girl?" he asked. "My cat fell in the lake ... and it couldn't swim ... so my father jumped in as well and drowned too," she cried," Sad, the man sighed, pulled down his pants and said, "Well I guess today's just not your day,"

Why did the Black man kill the White man? So he could end up in jail with the rest of his family.

question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

Non-Anti-Joke.com!

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

If you just read this, You're dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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