Why does a squirel swim on his back? Because it was trying to keep his nuts clean

the bible

What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

If you give a man a fish, he'll eat it.

Why did the Black man kill the White man? So he could end up in jail with the rest of his family.

A man was walking through the woods when he comes across a little girl crying by a lake. "What is the matter little girl?" he asked. "My cat fell in the lake ... and it couldn't swim ... so my father jumped in as well and drowned too," she cried," Sad, the man sighed, pulled down his pants and said, "Well I guess today's just not your day,"

whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

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Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

If you just read this, You're dead.

How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

Whats worst than the holocaust? What? 6million Jews.

A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

what do you call a guy with no arm and legs laying by the door? Matt! what do you call a guy with no arms and legs floating on water Bob!

Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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