What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A rapist and a little child walk through a dark forest. The little child says: "It's scary here." Rapist answers: "Tell me about, I gotta go back alone through here."

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Holocaust. I was too lazy to make it complete, so enjoy the punchline and comment your own question. It will probably be funnier.

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What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

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Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

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In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Screwing in a lightbulb is a simple, menial task, and the fact that the man was a Jew is irrelevant.

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what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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What did the jew say to the black man? I'm jewish

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

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What do you call a Muslim pilot? An accident waiting to happen

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

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What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

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What is the difference between a black baby and a tractor? A tractor is heavy and a baby is not

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hey hey apple

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

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Where can you find a tetraplegic? Where you left him.

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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A priest, a rabbi and Santa walk into a bar. that's a highly coincidental situation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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