What song did Buddy the elf sing for Santa on his birthday? Happy birthday

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What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

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Why did the blonde jump off the bridge? She was clinically depressed and wanted to end her life

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like. The man says,"I'm feeling light today so I'll just have some H2O." The man's friend says,"I'm feeling the same. I'll have some H2O, too." The second man died.

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Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

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- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

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What do you call an Asian guy doing homework? A student

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It was Jimmy's 18th bday so his parents let him have the house to himself. He ate shrooms, fucked his turtle, then had his dick bitten off.

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What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

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A Jew walks into a bar........... he buys it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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