What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

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Persond A: A guy blows himself and his family up with a hand grenade Person B: HEY!!! Thats not funny thats how my family died

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What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

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Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

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Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

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Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

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why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. why;d the banana fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

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What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

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Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

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Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

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drugs.

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Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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