Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

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you know whats better than lemonade? sex

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

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what did Tim do when he got married? He kissed the bride Mecheoo LOVES ASS

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I'm not one to tell gay jokes So I won't

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Cheese

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What makes my fourth grade librarian hot? The fact that I set her on fire

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What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

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knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? cancer

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The only time when white and black are together When I've just taken a shit! ?ttis

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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why did you poop because you are a poop

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WHO'S YO DADDY? the man who's semen combined with your mother's egg to create a child.

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One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

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(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

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Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

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Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

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A jew walks into a bar He receives a phone call and promptly leaves

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why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

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Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

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A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops