Two guys walk into a bar the third guy ducks

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A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

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Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

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I'd tell you a joke about Uganda but it wouldn't be worth it as it probably would keep a low score and possibly even get deleted for staying a week with a negative rating, for a number of reasons including that it isn't particularly funny, it was copied from another website and it is slightly racist. Taking into account what most people look for in a joke, it doesn't necessarily meet their needs and would more than likely fall into a lame category. And for that reason I have not submitted it.

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what has two feet and is black all over? your mom after she died in a horrific house fire.

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what did the left foot say to the right foot? Nothing, feet don't talk

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roses are red,violets,are green who tf shit in the toilet?

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Your dad got tired while running, so he stopped running.

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why did the roof cave in? It was not structurally sound do to poor architecture

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whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

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A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

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What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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Diarrhea

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Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

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I have two coins in my hand that add up to 30 cents, and one of them is not a nickel. I accidentally dropped them.

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Why did the girl cry when her boyfriend brought up the topic about rape? Because she was raped by her father as a child and it was a suppressed memory.

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What does Spiderman do everyday? Aunt May

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She look like Ms. Universe and I'm bout to be in that black hole

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What's worse than farting in front of your boyfriend? Farting on your boyfriends pillow and giving him pink eye.

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What did the day say to his son when he came out of the closet? Its alright

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What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

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Im taking a shit right now.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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