How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

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where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

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Why did the boy break his leg? Because he fell off a building

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Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Rivkee Rivkee who? RIVKEEEEE FIRETRUCK!

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue Shut up I'm watching Re-runs of FRIENDS.

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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What did the ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved

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Knock Knock Come in

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

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why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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