A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

So, a Bobcat walks into a bar. A few moments later, the bar was empty, save a bobcat and two critically wounded men.

Knock knock. Get out!!

knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

What is the best time to go to the dentist? When you have a toothache

Why did Santa die? Because he got diabetes from so many cookies

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping cart? One holds groceries. The other molests small children.

What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

Whats brown and a fag? A bundle of sticks

why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

Q. What do you get when you put a Jew and Adolf Hitler in the same room? A. Trouble

Why was the boy sad? because the serotonin level in his brain was significantly lower than normal.

Knock knock. Who's there? the police.

whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? thier skin tone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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