Why did the boy fail his test? Because he got shot before he could even study.

Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

Why did the black man jump off the cliff? Well , you see, this black mans name was yargle, and during his high school years, people always made nicknames for him some of which were fat yargle, yargaryar, and bottomyarg. He thought to himself that wanted revenge, So he killed the entire population of earth. Oh ya, and since he was the last human, wirhout possibility of reproduction, he went to the store and bought a can of soup

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

You no what the biggest lie in history is? Agreeing to the terms and services whenever you sign up for a website

How to find if your overweight? Ask your friend to make a big clay volcano, out of baking soda and vinegar. While its erupting if you're too busy eatin five course dinner. FAT

Aye I heard somethin about yo mom WAT!!!!!!!!! She a bop

whats worse than dieing in an airplane? jumping out of the airplane to save yourself and emediatly getting shredded by the massive engine you did not have the wits to see.

There once was an old man. He had worked hard his whole life to make sure his children got everything they needed, and that they were always happy. He had a beautiul life and a great big house with a marvelous view of the ocean. In time his kids moved away, and his wife died. The old man was left all by himself in the great big house, and sometimes the emptiness of the house reminded him of the emptiness of his own heart. He very seldom cried though, and kept all of his emotions inside. One day it all became to much for him and he took his own life in the silence of his great big empty house. I was that ocean.

A boy is diagnosed with terminal cancer. His family prays for him and he still dies.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

A man goes to the potty.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

What did the prison inmate get for Christmas? A warm chair to sit in

knock knock. "who's there?" dick. "dick who?" dick ferns.

guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

i need a pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

I am a mime

What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

What did the cat say to the dog? Communism

Why does Shelby Like Pandora? Because she prefers rap and hip hop music and Pandora helps select songs for her to listen to according to her interests.

The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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