How do you offend a black man? Call him a nigger.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Beans, beans, are good for your heart the more you eat the less hungry you are.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Two little boys are talking to each other: - My dad's dick is soo biig! - Eh, my dad's dick is small but it still hurts...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what did one lady say to another lady we are both ladies

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

thumb_up thumb_down -9

these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

thumb_up thumb_down -9

-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what's bloody and sweet? A squashed mosquito sprinkled with sugar.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why do people where saggy pants that don't fit? They can't afford too buy new

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops