What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This poem sucks Because violets are purple

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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yo mamma so fat she should probably look into a clinical weight loss program and exercise daily.

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Why were you in an igloo? I don't know, why were you?

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The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

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What do you call a Koala bear that does not have a chin? A Koala bear.

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Knock Knock. Who`s there? Hadooouuuuuuu! Hadou who? KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! PERFECT!!! Perfect Bonus: 38493483948394839483984 Skill 0000000 Your life 0 Bonus 9001

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

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Anti pick up line: Boy: If I could re arrange the letters I would put U and I together. Girl: Oh really because if I could rearrange the letters I would put F and U together By Adam Chebali

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teacher: who's going to pass english? students: us teacher: not you, i lied about the passing

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What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

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A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

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Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

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Why does Shelby Like Pandora? Because she prefers rap and hip hop music and Pandora helps select songs for her to listen to according to her interests.

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Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

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what is the difference between oral and anal? anal makes your day and anal makes your whole weak

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what happened to the frog that had a car accident, nothing it's dead

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Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Cover me, im going in.

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What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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