Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

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What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing becasue a mute is a person who cannot speak and a deaf man ould not hear the jumbled mumblings anyway.

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y does byonce sing to the left? because black people have no rights

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Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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My name is Jacob Mckeand and my penis is as long as Mr. Macs hair.

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What made the old man laugh? A pile of dead babies.

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every knight i see an owl at window

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

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whats worse than failing your maths test?

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So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

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What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

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Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

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Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

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What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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