A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? a bench is a structure designed for sitting and a Mexican is a person born in Mexico.

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

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Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

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time to spruce up!

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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Your mamma's so dumb, she's had problems functioning in society, due to illiteracy problems, and a general incomprehension of her surroundings and own thoughts.

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your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

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What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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