Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being black

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

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Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

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A fat guy!

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What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Why was the girl distressed by the photo of her boyfriend's mutilated corpse? Because it was out of focus.

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like. The man says,"I'm feeling light today so I'll just have some H2O." The man's friend says,"I'm feeling the same. I'll have some H2O, too." The second man died.

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Why was everyone afraid of Nick Morton? Because he had AIDS

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Why was little Timmy mauled by a bear? He poked it with a pointy stick.

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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There's a black man in my family tree. Therefore, I could be considered biracial.

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how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

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What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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whats green and slimy? green slim

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a dyslexic man walked his god.

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whats better than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees whats better than 1 baby nailed to 10 trees? 10 trees nailed to 1 baby

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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