What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

why was 6 afraid of seven? cause 7's a n i g g a

Don't you just hate it when somebody is saying something interesting and they don't finish their sentence?

Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

Why Didn't jeff go to school yesterday? He was dead.

"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead.

What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

Like is like a penis long and easy. But women make it hard

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

What is the only non-racist animal? The mexican panda. Why? It's black, white, hispanic, and asian.

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is nonsentient, generally heavier and not necessarily light-dark brown colored, whereas the black man is fully capable of thinking and usually has dark toned skin.

Phoebe: Joey, it's a birthday party. Joey: Yeah, but for a one year old. What's the point? The other day, she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow. And the cow says...."Elmoooo!" Joey: *starts to laugh* Yeah...that's a funny cup.

A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, because they have turned to alcoholism because there is no God. GO COMMUNISM, BOO AMERICA.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? ...Because he was buried in a churchyard.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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