Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

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Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

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You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

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whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

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Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

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What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

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whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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