The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

Roses are red, Your blood is too, Don't believe me? I WILL CUT YOU

what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

There once was a man from Nantucket. He lived a long, full life. Outside of Nantucket. But he visited occasionally.

A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

Turkey Balls

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

A bunch of teens were egging the house of their science teacher for giving them homework over break. They got caught by their teacher's ex-husband and he told them, "She broke up with me for telling her she was being too hard on her students. So, my friends, egg on!!!!!"

What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

what did the captcha response say to the man? ofdorno which.

Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

What do you call a successful black man who owns millions? Either a criminal or a fictional character.

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

What did the old person find on the internet? Porn.

Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

will you like this joke my sources say no

What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

Why didn't the little boy have arms or legs? Because they were savagely ripped off of him by a black bear on a very unfortunate camping trip.

What do you call an overly-sexual, chewbacca-like creature that smokes cocaine and shoots heroin, while beating its offspring? Mom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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