What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

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What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Carnations are cheap and they will not get you a blow job.

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I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

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whats white and sticky? a white stick

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fridge

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What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

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roses are red poo is poo

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What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your husband died.

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how many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

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A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

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A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

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If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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A women left the kitchen.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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