A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

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What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

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Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

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knock knock

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

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Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

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Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

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What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

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A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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