Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

Whats grey and kills people, Terminal cancer,I lied about the grey color

Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

Josh Groban, John Mayer, Ben Folds and Nick Cave are at an underground club that specialises in lithuanian folk music and siberian vodka. end of story

Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

How do you make an Indian explode? Push the red button

A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

What's got 2 thumbs and a massive penis? A body parts collector I know called Harold Fortescue

Whats worse than a joke? This

Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

"I'm so hungry!" "Hello so hungry, I am Matt. You must come from a very odd family if your name is " so hungry"!

dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

Why did you laugh at this joke. Because it was funny.

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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