What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

What has two legs? Half a cat

Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

Knock Knock Who did that?

Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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