How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

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im typing this without looking at the jetviard. I can;t toycg type thar wekk yet

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Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

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What did little Ben's mom give him for Christmas? Nothing. She died last month

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what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

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what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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Why did the Jewish population diminish in the '40s? Showers and Ovens

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What device will find furniture in a poorly lit room every time? An infrared camera.

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Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

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What is an antijoke? Not Knock

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What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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What's long and black? A long and black object.

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A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender serves the duck the beer. Later, the bartender wonders to himself when his life got so out of control.

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Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

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like if your cool

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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What did the computer say to his girlfriend? I'm going to RAM you tonight.

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

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why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

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Why was the black person playing hockey? Because he found an interest to the sport during his childhood years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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