roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

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why did the man cross the rode? He didn't he got hit by a bus

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#IHateHashtags

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

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Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

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Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

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A woman walked into a college.....which wasn't suprising because she never learned to read

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

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welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

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Yes and no, you would have ruined what is beautiful yet different within your soul.

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What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

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Q: What do you get when you get a bunch of people who confuse dark humor for anti humor? A: This website.

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Neither have I, nobody knew him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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